I am having a really awful week so far

6 replies
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So I came in here to get cheered up. Please make me laugh by posting something humorous
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  • Profile picture of the author oliviasmith
    A businessman dragged himself home and barely made it to his chair before he dropped exhausted.
    His sympathetic wife was right there with a tall cool drink and a comforting word. "My, you look tired," she said. "You must have had a hard day today. What happened to make you so exhausted?"
    "It was terrible," her husband said. "The computer broke down and all of us had to do our own thinking."

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  • Profile picture of the author Diane S
    I washed a sock. Then I put it in the dryer. When I took it out, it was gone.
    -- Steven Wright
    KimW still needs our help DONATE DIRECTLY
    My First Kindle Book: Ten Days in the Land of Smile
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    • Profile picture of the author Roaddog
      A guy walks into a bar. There's a big sign which says, "Free beer
      for life to first person who can pass the test!"

      "What test?" the guys asks.

      "Well ya' see," the bartender replies, "there's a tradition that the
      first guy who can pass the three challenges gets free beer for life.
      But, no one's ever done it. First, there's a gallon of pepper
      tequila, and you have to drink the whole thing at once, AND you can't
      make a face while doing it. If that doesn't kill you, then there's
      an alligator out back with a sore tooth, and you need to go out there
      and remove it with your bare hands. Finally, there's a woman
      upstairs who's never had an orgasm. You need to make things right
      for her."

      "Yeah, well thanks but no," the guy responds, "That sounds crazy.
      I mean what kind of idiot would drink that much pepper tequila, and
      it gets crazier from there."

      But, as often happens in bars, the man drinks a few beers. And in
      the fullness of time, what used to sound crazy now seems like a real
      good idea.

      "Shhwears zat Pepper Tekeela?" he urps.

      First he grabs a hold of the bottle of pepper tequila with both
      hands, and knocks it back in big slurp with tears streaming down his
      face. Next, he staggers out the back door. And soon, all inside
      hear the most frightful roaring and thumping. Then silence. The man
      staggers back into the bar... his shirt's all ripped up and his body
      has big scratches.

      He yells out, "Now where's that woman with the sore tooth?"
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  • Profile picture of the author Audrey Harvey
    A husband and wife were sitting out on the balcony having a drink. The woman said "I love you" the husband replied "Is that you or the wine talking?"
    She said "It's me talking.... to the wine"

    Expert content written by an experienced veterinarian and published magazine and newspaper writer.
    Feel free to contact me for details.
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