So....?

13 years ago

Make a tasty snack.

What would you do if you had two canoes?

Thanks
1 reply

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Alexa Smith Banned 13 years ago

Originally Posted by Dan Riffle

What would you do if you had two canoes?

Blog about them.

What would you do if you had two lyrichords?
- Thanks
- 1 reply
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- Robert Michael 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Alexa Smith
  
  Blog about them.
  
  What would you do if you had two lyrichords?
  
  Ponder to myself wtf I was in possession of..
  
  lol
  
  What would you do if you only had 2 hours to live?
  
  Thanks
  
  1 reply
  
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  Alexa Smith Banned 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Whos That Guru
  
  What would you do if you only had 2 hours to live?
  
  Die (after a couple of hours).
  
  What would you do if you had two hauberks?
  
  [ 2 ] Thanks
  
  1 reply
  
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  Dan Riffle 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Alexa Smith
  
  What would you do if you had two hauberks?
  
  Wear one and stuff the other with foam and attack it with a sword.
  
  What would you do if you had two thumbs on each hand?
  
  Thanks
  
  1 reply
  
  Signature
  
  Raising a child is akin to knowing you're getting fired in 18 years and having to train your replacement without actively sabotaging them.
  
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  HeySal 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Dan Riffle
  
  Wear one and stuff the other with foam and attack it with a sword.
  
  What would you do if you had two thumbs on each hand?
  
  Be doubly opposed to things?
  
  What would you do if you had two dollars?
  
  [ 2 ] Thanks
  
  1 reply
  
  Signature
  
  Sal
  When the Roads and Paths end, learn to guide yourself through the wilderness
  Beyond the Path
  
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  Alexa Smith Banned 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by HeySal
  
  What would you do if you had two dollars?
  
  Make 100 posts here offering "just my two cents".
  
  What would you do if you had two brains?
  
  [ 1 ] Thanks
  
  1 reply
  
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  Lucian Lada 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Alexa Smith
  
  What would you do if you had two brains?
  
  Wash them.
  
  What would you do if you had two husbands?
  
  Thanks
  
  Signature
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HeySal

13 years ago

Teach one to do housework and the other to do lapidary.

What would you do if you had two cabbages?

Thanks
1 reply

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Sal
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whateverpedia 13 years ago

Originally Posted by HeySal

What would you do if you had two cabbages?

Start a HeySal fan club.

What would you do if you had two chooks?
- Thanks
- 1 reply
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- Alexa Smith Banned 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by whateverpedia
  
  What would you do if you had two chooks?
  
  Put all the eggs in one basket and sell them.
  
  What would you do if you had two farrucas?
  
  Thanks
  
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HeySal

13 years ago

Buy a dictionary to find out what the hell it is that I have.

What would you do if you had two crazy lace agates?

Thanks
1 reply

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Sal
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Alexa Smith Banned 13 years ago

Originally Posted by HeySal

What would you do if you had two crazy lace agates?

Sell them to a crystal therapist, or offer them to you to add to your collection.

What would you do if you had two laccoliths?
- Thanks
- 1 reply
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- whateverpedia 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Alexa Smith
  
  What would you do if you had two laccoliths?
  
  Introduce them to two batholiths so they can go on a double date.
  
  What would you do if you had two tourons?
  
  Thanks
  
  1 reply
  
  Signature
  
  Why do garden gnomes smell so bad?
  So that blind people can hate them as well.
  
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  Alexa Smith Banned 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by whateverpedia
  
  What would you do if you had two tourons?
  
  Give them to my cleaner for her children, probably, rather than risk my own teeth on them.
  
  What would you do if you had two Tuaregs?
  
  Thanks
  
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HeySal

13 years ago

Have a tea party in a field?

What would you do if you had two procyonidae?

Thanks
1 reply

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Alexa Smith Banned 13 years ago

Originally Posted by HeySal

What would you do if you had two procyonidae?

Take them to the dentist to have their Cardassian teeth fixed. No, wait a minute ... their carnassian teeth. Those are the ones. (Or, as Woody Allen once put it: "I couldn't make it, that night: my raccoon had hepatitis").

What would you do if you had two vendanges?
- Thanks
- 1 reply
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- HeySal 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Alexa Smith
  
  What would you do if you had two vendanges?
  
  Eat. A lot. And sell, too.
  
  What would you do if you had two Fregoli delusions?
  
  Thanks
  
  1 reply
  
  Signature
  
  Sal
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  Beyond the Path
  
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  Alexa Smith Banned 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by HeySal
  
  What would you do if you had two Fregoli delusions?
  
  Consult Oliver Sacks?
  
  What would you do if you had two frangipane recipes?
  
  Thanks
  
  1 reply
  
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  HeySal 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Alexa Smith
  
  Consult Oliver Sacks?
  
  What would you do if you had two frangipane recipes?
  
  Oh easy. I'd give them away -- FAST. I'm allergic to nuts. LOL.
  
  What would you do with two extra hours of spare time every day?
  
  Thanks
  
  1 reply
  
  Signature
  
  Sal
  When the Roads and Paths end, learn to guide yourself through the wilderness
  Beyond the Path
  
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  bizgrower 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by HeySal
  
  Oh easy. I'd give them away -- FAST. I'm allergic to nuts. LOL.
  
  What would you do with two extra hours of spare time every day?
  
  Google what you and Lexy are talking about to expand my knowledge and vocabulary.
  Oh, I almost have. lol
  
  What would you do with two thousand dollars?
  
  Thanks
  
  1 reply
  
  Signature
  
  "If you think you're the smartest person in the room, then you're probably in the wrong room."
  
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  Alexa Smith Banned 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by bizgrower
  
  What would you do with two thousand dollars?
  
  Put the car in for a service and then fill it with gas. :p
  
  What would you do if you had two left feet?
  
  Thanks
  
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HeySal

13 years ago

Find a guy with two right ones and dance.

What would you do if you had two tickets to paradise?

Thanks
1 reply

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whateverpedia

13 years ago

Originally Posted by HeySal

What would you do if you had two tickets to paradise?

Depends. Are the tickets one way or return.

What would you do if you had two girls for every boy?

Thanks
1 reply

Signature

Why do garden gnomes smell so bad?

So that blind people can hate them as well.

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Alexa Smith

Banned 13 years ago

Originally Posted by whateverpedia

What would you do if you had two girls for every boy?

Hope that 50% of the girls are gay, so that there'd be a perfect dating balance.

What would you do if you had two decastichs?

Thanks
1 reply

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Dan Riffle

13 years ago

Originally Posted by Alexa Smith

What would you do if you had two decastichs?

Combine them into one twenty line poem. (Score one for Lit 101!)

What would you do if you had two biremes?

Thanks
1 reply

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Alexa Smith

Banned 13 years ago

Originally Posted by Dan Riffle

What would you do if you had two biremes?

Advertise them for sale as "potential for an enthusiast to convert into a trireme with a spare reme in reserve".

What would you do if you had two birettas?

Thanks
1 reply

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Dan Riffle

13 years ago

Originally Posted by Alexa Smith

What would you do if you had two birettas?

I would wear them as a disguise and sneak into the Vatican and steal their wine.

What would you do if you had two Biréli Lagrène albums?

Thanks
1 reply

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Khemosabi

13 years ago

Originally Posted by Dan Riffle

What would you do if you had two Biréli Lagrène albums?

I'd sell them to aspiring gypsies!

What would you do with two cyclops!???

Thanks
1 reply

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Alexa Smith

Banned 13 years ago

Originally Posted by Khemosabi

What would you do with two cyclops!???

Offer them a shared/conjoined optical cortex transplant and explain to them how "binocular vision" works.

What would you do if you had two minotaurs?

[ 1 ] Thanks
1 reply

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MissTerraK

13 years ago

Originally Posted by Alexa Smith

Offer them a shared/conjoined optical cortex transplant and explain to them how "binocular vision" works.

What would you do if you had two minotaurs?

I would breed them with a cow and see what I came up with!

What would you do with two vignette's?

Terra

Thanks
1 reply

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Khemosabi

13 years ago

Originally Posted by MissTerraK

I would breed them with a cow and see what I came up with!

What would you do with two vignette's?

Terra

Get a couple of shoe boxes and some cotton balls, oh, and some paint. A few other supplies and make myself a theater. A simple sketch and one, very impacting poem, and in one visual scene, describe "the bar".

What would you do with two broken shoe strings?

Thanks
1 reply

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MissTerraK

13 years ago

Originally Posted by Khemosabi

Get a couple of shoe boxes and some cotton balls, oh, and some paint. A few other supplies and make myself a theater. A simple sketch and one, very impacting poem, and in one visual scene, describe "the bar".

What would you do with two broken shoe strings?

Tie them around my fingers to remember stuff.

What would you do with two hansoms?

Terra

Thanks

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Michael Ten

13 years ago

If I were to own two goats, I would take videos of them and upload them to YouTube, write about them and then sell them, probably.

Thanks
1 reply

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Dan Riffle 13 years ago

Originally Posted by Michael Ten

If I were to own two goats, I would take videos of them and upload them to YouTube, write about them and then sell them, probably.

Michael, you're killing the vibe here, buddy.
- [ 1 ] Thanks
Signature

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HeySal

13 years ago

Drive myself crazy in Arabic.

What would you do if you had two dipthongs?

Thanks
1 reply

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MissTerraK 13 years ago

Originally Posted by HeySal

Drive myself crazy in Arabic.

What would you do if you had two dipthongs?

Look like I was coming on to someone while sliding my tongue.

What would you do with two melographs?

Terra
- Thanks
- 1 reply
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- Alexa Smith Banned 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by MissTerraK
  
  What would you do with two melographs?
  
  Keep records of a song for two different choirs.
  
  What would you do if you had two dermatographs?
  
  Thanks
  
  1 reply
  
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  KingOfContentMarketing 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Alexa Smith
  
  Keep records of a song for two different choirs.
  
  What would you do if you had two dermatographs?
  
  Trade them for one Spirograph.
  
  What would you do with two Higgs Bosuns?
  
  Thanks
  
  1 reply
  
  Signature
  
  Marketing is not a battle of products. It is a battle of perceptions.
  - Jack Trout
  
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  Alexa Smith Banned 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by joe golfer
  
  What would you do with two Higgs Bosuns?
  
  Train them to run round the circuit inside that Hadron Collider in Switzerland and take side-bets on whether each of them will complete the course and/or win before the universe collapses.
  
  What would you do if you had two Royal Navy bosuns?
  
  Thanks
  
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HeySal

13 years ago

Lead the Rats (Republic's Adminstrative Treasoners) out of the US.........will lead them to Iceland. They'll have fun with them there.

What would you do if you had two Jeopardy's?

Thanks
1 reply

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Sal
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Alexa Smith

Banned 13 years ago

Originally Posted by HeySal

What would you do if you had two Jeopardy's?

Find the question to which the answer is "What would you do if you had two Jeopardy's?" (Have never seen it, but have heard of it ... it's something like that, I think, if I have the right one?).

What would you do if you had two flat shoes (

)?

Thanks
1 reply

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travlinguy

13 years ago

Originally Posted by Alexa Smith

Find the question to which the answer is "What would you do if you had two Jeopardy's?" (Have never seen it, but have heard of it ... it's something like that, I think, if I have the right one?).

What would you do if you had two flat shoes (

)?

I'd store them with the 14 flat shoes I presently own and perhaps wear them when I visit the Queen.

What would you do with two Macedonians in full battle array?

Thanks
1 reply

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bizgrower

13 years ago

Originally Posted by travlinguy

I'd store them with the 14 flat shoes I presently own and perhaps wear them when I visit the Queen.

What would you do with two Macedonians in full battle array?

I love this "bar".

If my wish was their command, I'd send them after Kim Jong-Un.
If not, I'd have the two Royal Navy bosuns take them to Iceland in the two
Tuaregs.

What would you do with two Michael Jordans?

[ 1 ] Thanks
1 reply

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Alexa Smith Banned 13 years ago

Originally Posted by bizgrower

What would you do with two Michael Jordans?

Appear in commercials with one of them and have the other coach that nice Mr. Obama on getting the ball through that little hoop thing?

What would you do if you had two Michael Jacksons?
- [ 1 ] Thanks
- 1 reply
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- Khemosabi 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Alexa Smith
  
  What would you do if you had two Michael Jacksons?
  
  Take one and plan the comeback tour of a lifetime! (there's a really bad joke in there, sorry), and then take the other one and go find Elvis!
  
  What would you do with two Great Whites?
  
  Thanks
  
  1 reply
  
  Signature
  
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  MissTerraK 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Khemosabi
  
  What would you do with two Great Whites?
  
  Put them in a cage in the ocean so you could go see them up close and personal, safely.
  
  What would you do if you had two limitarians?
  
  Terra
  
  [ 1 ] Thanks
  
  1 reply
  
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  Big Rob 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by MissTerraK
  
  Put them in a cage in the ocean so you could go see them up close and personal, safely.
  
  What would you do if you had two limitarians?
  
  Terra
  
  Impose term limits and deport Sean Hannity.
  
  What would you do with two Octogenarians?
  
  Thanks
  
  1 reply
  
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  Dan Riffle 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Big Rob
  
  What would you do with two Octogenarians?
  
  I'd send them over to your house to work on your roof. I figure you could use the help.
  
  What would you do with two octomoms?
  
  [ 1 ] Thanks
  
  2 replies
  
  Signature
  
  Raising a child is akin to knowing you're getting fired in 18 years and having to train your replacement without actively sabotaging them.
  
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  Khemosabi 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Dan Riffle
  
  What would you do with two octomoms?
  
  Sign up every kid and their mothers to Dan's lame list! :p
  
  What would you do with two glass spiders?
  
  Thanks
  
  1 reply
  
  Signature
  
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  MissTerraK 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Khemosabi
  
  What would you do with two glass spiders?
  
  Oh, this is easy. Stomp them into smithereens just like I do real ones!
  
  What would you do with two niblicks?
  
  Terra
  
  Thanks
  
  1 reply
  
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  travlinguy 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by MissTerraK
  
  Oh, this is easy. Stomp them into smithereens just like I do real ones!
  
  What would you do with two niblicks?
  
  Terra
  
  I'd flog the scarecrow that's been following me around until he split.
  
  What would you do with two bacchanalian relatives?
  
  Thanks
  
  1 reply
  
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  Alexa Smith Banned 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by travlinguy
  
  What would you do with two bacchanalian relatives?
  
  Get them to whistle up all the rest of the family and have a Bacchanalia.
  
  What would you do if you had two baculi?
  
  Thanks
  
  1 reply
  
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  travlinguy 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Alexa Smith
  
  Get them to whistle up all the rest of the family and have a Bacchanalia.
  
  What would you do if you had two baculi?
  
  I'd take one in each hand and continue flogging my scarecrow in public.
  
  What would you do with two nearsighted, bumble-fingered, left handed accoucheurs?
  
  Thanks
  
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  joseph7384 13 years ago
  
  [DELETED]
  
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  HeySal 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by joseph7384
  
  Give them some eye glasses and then feed them.
  
  What would you do with a blind duck that had two left feet?
  
  Put him in the bathtub and let him create a jacuzzi effect swimming in circles.
  
  What would you do with 2 Klondike Bars?
  
  [ 1 ] Thanks
  
  1 reply
  
  Signature
  
  Sal
  When the Roads and Paths end, learn to guide yourself through the wilderness
  Beyond the Path
  
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  Alexa Smith Banned 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by HeySal
  
  What would you do with 2 Klondike Bars?
  
  Import them into the UK and change their name by deed poll to "Choc Ices".
  
  What would you do if you had two kwarezimal recipes?
  
  Thanks
  
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  David Moore 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Dan Riffle
  
  What would you do with two octomoms?
  
  I will make a football club consist of those boys, and then make a soccer club for the girl.
  
  What would you do with two real live Troll in your living room right now?
  
  Thanks
  
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HeySal

13 years ago

Enforce mandatory sterilization.

Find the question to which the answer is "What would you do if you had two Jeopardy's?" (Have never seen it, but have heard of it ... it's something like that, I think, if I have the right one?).

Wasn't thinking of TV - was making a play on the phrase "double jeopardy". LOL

What would you do with a pair o' docs?

Thanks

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Sal
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HeySal

13 years ago

Give them away fast. I'm allergic to nuts.

What would you do if you had 2 Turtle Doves?

Thanks
1 reply

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Sal
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whateverpedia 13 years ago

Originally Posted by HeySal

What would you do if you had 2 Turtle Doves?

Start an aviary with the partridge in a pear tree.

Make it big because they're soon going to be joined by three french hens, four calling birds, six geese a-laying, and seven swans a-swimming.

What would you do if you had two (sic) much time on your hands?
- Thanks
- 1 reply
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Why do garden gnomes smell so bad?
So that blind people can hate them as well.
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- Alexa Smith Banned 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by whateverpedia
  
  What would you do if you had two (sic) much time on your hands?
  
  Curse my spellcheck software for letting these things through (sick).
  
  What would you do if you had (a tale of) two cities?
  
  Thanks
  
  1 reply
  
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  whateverpedia 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Alexa Smith
  
  What would you do if you had (a tale of) two cities?
  
  Have a Dickens of a time.
  
  What would you do if you had two legs from your hips to the ground?
  
  [ 2 ] Thanks
  
  1 reply
  
  Signature
  
  Why do garden gnomes smell so bad?
  So that blind people can hate them as well.
  
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  bizgrower 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by whateverpedia
  
  What would you do if you had two legs from your hips to the ground?
  
  Walk and walk until I stopped thinking about two octomoms.
  (Please no Kardashians in this thread.)
  
  What would you do if you had two dolphins?
  
  Thanks
  
  Signature
  
  "If you think you're the smartest person in the room, then you're probably in the wrong room."
  
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  joseph7384 13 years ago
  
  [DELETED]
  
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  Alexa Smith Banned 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by joseph7384
  
  What would you do with a turtle suffering from separation anxiety.
  
  Invest in a whole new set of diagnostic criteria/classifications, I think ...
  
  What would you do if you had two quellios?
  
  [ 1 ] Thanks
  
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HeySal

13 years ago

I'd put one around my neck and one around my ankles and go to a costume party as an axle.

What would you do if you had two overlapping spheres?

Thanks
1 reply

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Sal
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Alexa Smith Banned 13 years ago

Originally Posted by HeySal

What would you do if you had two overlapping spheres?

Set up a live demonstration of the Banach-Tarski paradox.

What would you do if you had two pure mathematicians?
- [ 1 ] Thanks
- 1 reply
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- travlinguy 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Alexa Smith
  
  Set up a live demonstration of the Banach-Tarski paradox.
  
  What would you do if you had two pure mathematicians?
  
  I'd send 'em to DC to straighten out the bozo-math crowd.
  What would you do with two Tibetan monks with a propensity for abstract detail?
  
  Thanks
  
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HeySal

13 years ago

Smoke a bowl and eat cheetoes.

What would you do with two sides of a triangle?

Thanks
1 reply

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Sal
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joseph7384 13 years ago

Originally Posted by HeySal

Smoke a bowl and eat cheetoes.

What would you do with two sides of a triangle?

Attach them to two more sides of a triangle to make a diamond.

What would you do with a Turkish donkey that was raised with chickens.
- Thanks
- 1 reply
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- Dan Riffle 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by joseph7384
  
  What would you do with a Turkish donkey that was raised with chickens.
  
  I'd beat the cluck out of him.
  
  What would you do with with two baluts?
  
  P.S.: No donkeys were harmed in the making of this post.
  
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  1 reply
  
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  Raising a child is akin to knowing you're getting fired in 18 years and having to train your replacement without actively sabotaging them.
  
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  joseph7384 13 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by Dan Riffle
  
  I'd beat the cluck out of him.
  
  What would you do with with two baluts?
  
  P.S.: No donkeys were harmed in the making of this post.
  
  I would try to sell them to a skate boarding dice throwing Filipino who loves duck eggs.
  
  What would you do with Roman Tympanum?
  
  Thanks
  
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