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TOO PRETTY to work!

by seasoned
46 replies
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A woman, in canada apparently, QUIT HER JOB claiming she was too pretty to work! FUNNY, I saw this on a show having 3 women, and they were ALL probably about as pretty as the one that quit!

Anyway, she only made about $30K USD(as I recall), and spent about 15% on makeup, etc.... BTW her MOTHER is supporting her!

Steve
  • Profile picture of the author Kay King
    Sounds like her mother raised a fool - and is now stuck with her.
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  • Profile picture of the author alistair
    I find this type of thing slightly annoying. All I think is so what, go tell somebody that cares because I couldn't give a toss. If she ends up living on the streets or whatever because she thinks she's too pretty for work then serves her right.

    I think that's the problem today, some people don't want to work, they just want everything given to them on a silver platter. People make a big deal out of something like this and she gets all the publicity and attention she's looking for. Grow up and stop deluding yourself.
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    • Profile picture of the author Kay King
      I agree it's sad people like this get so much attention - but fact is we are laughing AT them, not with them.

      You have to laugh at a woman that spends that much money on her hair every money and complains about being noticed.

      My advice: For work hours - skip the hair extensions and flowing tresses and pull your hair straight back in a bun or cut it short. Raise the neckline up and extend the hemline down, dump the 6 inch heels and about half the makeup and add a pair of glasses.

      No one will take you seriously until you take yourself seriously.
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  • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
    If she's too pretty to work she must also be too pretty to eat.

    (By that I mean she must be too pretty to consume food, not too pretty for someone to cannibalize her.)
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    • Profile picture of the author joseph7384
      Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

      If she's too pretty to work she must also be too pretty to eat.

      (By that I mean she must be too pretty to consume food, not too pretty for someone to cannibalize her.)
      Well, we sure hope that's what you meant, lol.
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      • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
        Originally Posted by joseph7384 View Post

        Well, we sure hope that's what you meant, lol.
        I'm going to sidestep the obvious opening you gave me. I don't want to put my foot (or anything else) in my mouth.
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        • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
          When I sold in people's homes...if they had children, I absolutely couldn't show any impatience with interruptions or crying. If I gave any hint that I wasn't finding their kids adorable... the mother would pick up on it...and the sale was lost.

          Again, I find it impossible to see the world from a woman's point of view. We are really very different. I've even given up trying to market to women. I market to men, and some women like what I say.

          I tell my wife; "You have to not be subtle. You have to dumb down what you say. Be clear. I simply don't have the ability to understand subtleties of meaning."

          Women have multiple layers of emotion and meaning.
          Men? To me, my emotions are Horny, Hungry, and Tired. I'm good for reaching high cupboards and carrying heavy boxes. There. I found my purpose in life.
          Yeah, weird, l walk into a coffee shop after working hard online, and the silence is broken by some high pitched screaming nightmare!

          Her and her friends, etc, may think the baby is wonderful, but everyone else is thinking, "take the ***** to the food-court, instead of a quiet coffee shop!!!!.

          Bottom line is baby's all look similar, it is only because it is yours that makes the situation different.

          God knows why baby photos in women's mag,s are so popular, when it looks exactly like everyone's else, apart from the silver spoon!

          Shane
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        • Profile picture of the author Big Rob
          Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

          I'm going to sidestep the obvious opening you gave me. I don't want to put my foot (or anything else) in my mouth.
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  • Profile picture of the author AdamYoungpeter
    Geez, when I hear of things like this I just get sad. What an entitled civilization we are. She's pretty so she deserves an easy life? Her mom should kick her out of the house immediately.
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    • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
      Originally Posted by AdamYoungpeter View Post

      Geez, when I hear of things like this I just get sad. What an entitled civilization we are. She's pretty so she deserves an easy life? Her mom should kick her out of the house immediately.
      Adam, the problem here is she's forgotten the most important part of the "too pretty to work" formula: she has to find a rich man to support her BEFORE she quits her job. Too pretty to work. Too stupid to think.

      Pics here:
      http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/2013...n_3306311.html

      She's moderately attractive, but not quite "trophy wife" material in my humble opinion.
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    • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
      I find this type of thing slightly annoying. All I think is so what, go tell somebody that cares because I couldn't give a toss. If she ends up living on the streets or whatever because she thinks she's too pretty for work then serves her right.

      I think that's the problem today, some people don't want to work, they just want everything given to them on a silver platter. People make a big deal out of something like this and she gets all the publicity and attention she's looking for. Grow up and stop deluding yourself.
      Its not over yet, guaranteed she will show up on "Whos Got Talent" or a multitude of trashy one hour shows. She will probably show up on Dr Phill, where people who aren't allowed to watch Scooby Do, apparently get clinically depressed, and need to go on Prozac for life!!!! :rolleyes:

      Shane

      Or she will get put out of her misery, by going to a shopping centre at the same time as a loony with a semi automatic?
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      • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
        I can't speak about this girl's experience..because I don't know enough about it. But from my own experience, young attractive women have to put up with a lot of nonsense from male co-workers.

        If she's polite...she's a tease.
        If she smiles at you..she's flirting.
        If she tells you to stop teasing her...she's a bitch.

        Attractive women develop a thick skin, and try to ignore the unwanted attention.

        And they don't have to be models. If there are 10 young guys in the office and one single girl that is attractive...she'll get hassled. And the girl in the article? I think it may be that she is um..demure.
        Attractive women who are demure (act shy) are an easier target for some men.

        Usually though, these ladies can stop it with just a few words of discouragement.
        Acting like one of the guys helps.

        At least, that's what I've seen.

        And of course...this is coming from a guy.
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        • Profile picture of the author thunderbird
          Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

          <snip>...in the office and one single girl that is attractive...she'll get hassled. <snip>
          This may somewhat taboo to mention, but such a young woman may also targeted by female co-workers for workplace bullying, which is as common as bullying in schools though it takes different forms. The battles between women are often quite nasty. There is infighting between women that dudes, including myself, are tone-deaf and color-blind to. My wife introduced me to that nasty world world invisible to most men. Often, the abuse is actually worse than that from male co-workers. I find in Canada that guy are often, if anything, hyper-sensitive to this. But this story takes place in Britain. Do they still feature attractive women in topless pics-of-the-day in mainstream British newspapers?



          EDIT: I just read an article and voila! "Fernee says female workers did not like her because of all the attention she received from the men."
           The woman in question did actually attain a Ph.D. -- which is A LOT of work -- and did attempt working life. She says co-workers unwanted attention made it difficult to properly perform her job. If it is a nasty work-environment and her family has the resources to spare her from something nasty, I have no problem with that. All power to them. Anyway, she's 33. It won't be too long before time heals her of the problem of being too pretty (I already see signs of the ravages of time in her face).
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          • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
            Originally Posted by thunderbird View Post

            This may somewhat taboo to mention, but such a young woman may also targeted by female co-workers for workplace bullying, which is as common as bullying in schools though it takes different forms. The battles between women are often quite nasty.
            Yeah, I know about some women not liking the attractive one...but I didn't know how to say it. It doesn't happen with men. Men don't dislike good looking men.

            But I know that I should never say in front of a woman that another woman is attractive. Most times, it won't matter, but why risk that bullet?

            I have a platonic friend that is a woman. We are very close and call each other every few days. We are both married.

            And she hates it if I mention anything about another woman. If we are at a conference together (usually with at least one spouse), if I see a beautiful woman and mention anything about how she looks, my friend gets annoyed. "Is that all you guys think about?" and I might say "For the last 3 seconds? Yes". Women just have a completely different take on being attractive than men do.

            Women speakers get completely different compliments than men. Women in the audience judge women speakers by completely different rules than men speakers. It's a reality, and one I have given up trying to understand.

            One of the most impressive things I've ever heard was a male copywriter (at the Raleigh NC Warrior Event) telling me how he can write in a woman's voice. Completely beyond me.

            by the way; the photo in post #12?
            Study her features. She has near perfect features when a man is considering what is attractive.
            She has features similar to a child. Your instinct is to protect her. I've watched a few specials on TV about what we find attractive, and why. It's interesting stuff.
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            • Profile picture of the author thunderbird
              Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

              Yeah, I know about some women not liking the attractive one...but I didn't know how to say it. It doesn't happen with men. Men don't dislike good looking men.<snip>
              OK, now we're having this conversation, I'm going to mention something really weird that I recently discovered, but never imagined could or would happen. Mothers of small children who are average-looking get jealous of other mothers who have goodlooking children.
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              • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
                Originally Posted by thunderbird View Post

                OK, now we're having this conversation, I'm going to mention something really weird that I recently discovered, but never imagined could or would happen. Mothers of small children who are average-looking get jealous of other mothers who have goodlooking children.
                I KNOW! Grandmothers too! Grandfathers and fathers? Almost don't care at all.
                Maybe it's because mothers are closer to their children, but I know never...never say anything about a child other than "How wonderful".

                I was in a restaurant once sitting in a booth next to a mother, father, grandmother, and three screaming kids. After about half an hour, my wife said "Why are you smiling?", and I said "I'm just thinking that we won't have any more kids".
                The mother and grandmother heard me. The father turns around and said "You and I are on the same page, brother".

                And the two women stared at me until they left. They wanted me to Die.

                When I sold in people's homes...if they had children, I absolutely couldn't show any impatience with interruptions or crying. If I gave any hint that I wasn't finding their kids adorable... the mother would pick up on it...and the sale was lost.

                Again, I find it impossible to see the world from a woman's point of view. We are really very different. I've even given up trying to market to women. I market to men, and some women like what I say.

                I tell my wife; "You have to not be subtle. You have to dumb down what you say. Be clear. I simply don't have the ability to understand subtleties of meaning."

                Women have multiple layers of emotion and meaning.
                Men? To me, my emotions are Horny, Hungry, and Tired. I'm good for reaching high cupboards and carrying heavy boxes. There. I found my purpose in life.
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                • Profile picture of the author Kay King
                  .never say anything about a child other than "How wonderful".
                  Ain't that the truth.

                  I had to laugh as it hit home. I recently spent an hour with a co-worker who brought her small daughter along to a meeting. I complimented her on how "adorable" her toddler was with her pretty eyes and curly hair. Mommy just beamed at the compliments and I was relieved.

                  Beautiful child - but I certainly wasn't jealous. I had to find something good to say - the kid was loud, demanding and obnoxious so looks were all I had left to work with
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  • Profile picture of the author Kurt
    Did anyone actually read the article?

    She has a PHD and claims she was hassled at work due to her appearance.

    While she has a pretty good opinion of her self, she never claimed that she shouldn't have to work because of being pretty, only that she couldn't work because she was being hassled so much at work.

    IMO, it isn't a case of being "entitled", it's a case of not being tough enough, two totally different issues, and it's possible that maybe it really was too much of a hassle.
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    • Profile picture of the author Kay King
      I think it may be a case of sending mixed messages for this woman.

      As I recall the article said she spends what would be $1000 a month US on her HAIR.

      Ph.D. or not - if you are playing up your looks to that extent, you are not saying "take me seriously".
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  • Profile picture of the author seasoned
    Well, I only saw it on the news, heard about how she quit, was living off her mother, etc... And how she was going to write a book encouraging others to quit. If she is SO smart, etc... She could get another job paying AT LEAST as well.

    As for children? I have seen some ugly ones end up looking attractive, and vice/versa. So WHO KNOWS?

    Steve
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  • Profile picture of the author bizgrower
    This is from one of the commenters under the Huffington Post article:
    (I especially like how she handled the love poems.)

    "I was told I had a lovely bum by a male colleague. I stepped on his foot with my stiletto heel. Another colleague used to put love poems in my pigeon hole. I corrected the spellings and gave him marks out of ten and returned them.
    But then, I didn't have rich parents and I wasn't hoping for a publishing contract or a career as a third rate celeb."

    ------------------------------------------------------

    It IS a shame when any workplace has a bad atmosphere.

    If this is a pattern with her, then she needs to gain some courage and an attitude adjustment. If this is a first time for her in a career position, which it may well be given her PhD status, then she was hunting a job when she found that one. Most all of us have had jobs we didn't like for one reason or another.

    One of my favorite college professors had a PhD and held executive jobs before teaching (Human Resources coincidentally). She also happened to be very pretty and dressed in heels, dresses, and necklaces... Obviously she managed quite well.

    Dan
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  • Profile picture of the author KimW
    Am I the only one that doesn't think she is "all that"?
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    • Profile picture of the author Dennis Gaskill
      Originally Posted by KimW View Post

      Am I the only one that doesn't think she is "all that"?
      Nope.

      .....
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    • Profile picture of the author seasoned
      Originally Posted by KimW View Post

      Am I the only one that doesn't think she is "all that"?
      If she were ******SO****** pretty, then so many others would be also, so what is the point? ANYONE can get harassed for ANY reason and pretty or ugly doesn't change things much here. and if she thinks she is SO fantastic, why does she pay so much for "beauty aids", etc?

      Steve
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  • Profile picture of the author HeySal
    Oh. I saw the title of the thread and thought it was about me. Guess I have to finish writing this damn ebook after all. sigh.

    Well either I'm just not a cute as I used to be in my 20's (LOL - ya think?) or guys have calmed down a lot in the last 35 years. I remember at work standing at the boss's desk telling him "if you were any good, you'd know how to seduce me and wouldn't have to threaten my job. You better be sure that's what you want because if you aren't exceptional every woman in town is going to know it." Then I just smiled a very mean smile and walked off. He left me alone. I had a few experiences like that but I think that was just the times. Most of my friends had problems with guys in the workplace, too - so we'd get together and talk about how to shut them down without losing jobs over it. I can be verbally emasculating and that backed them all off. One gave you problems and you annihilated him on the spot in front of at least several people and that was it for them all. Nobody would approach you after that.

    The only time I got fired for it was when I quoted Kurt Vonnegut to the boos: "Go take a flying F*** at a rolling donut."

    I wasn't even anything over the average cute young chick - I had friends who were drop dead gorgeous and a lot of them quit jobs because of workplace harassment. They got other jobs - they just quit working where there was no respect for them. It pretty much sucks when it gets so bad that you don't even know you're safe at your job. Either the laws have had a really good effect or guys just don't harass women that are old enough to be their grandmother. LOL.

    As far as other women -- I'd rather deal with the men. It drives me crazy that women get completely bent out of shape if their husbands or boyfriends so much as speak to you. Why is it that they think that just because they found the dweeb attractive, everyone wants him? That's one thing that seems to get worse as I age instead of better.

    As far as the woman in the pic - I think she's adorable, and I can see how she might have a lot of trouble from people at work.
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    • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
      Originally Posted by HeySal View Post

      Oh. I saw the title of the thread and thought it was about me. Guess I have to finish writing this damn ebook after all. sigh.

      Well either I'm just not a cute as I used to be in my 20's (LOL - ya think?) or guys have calmed down a lot in the last 35 years. I remember at work standing at the boss's desk telling him "if you were any good, you'd know how to seduce me and wouldn't have to threaten my job. You better be sure that's what you want because if you aren't exceptional every woman in town is going to know it." Then I just smiled a very mean smile and walked off. He left me alone. I had a few experiences like that but I think that was just the times. Most of my friends had problems with guys in the workplace, too - so we'd get together and talk about how to shut them down without losing jobs over it. I can be verbally emasculating and that backed them all off. One gave you problems and you annihilated him on the spot in front of at least several people and that was it for them all. Nobody would approach you after that.

      The only time I got fired for it was when I quoted Kurt Vonnegut to the boos: "Go take a flying F*** at a rolling donut."

      I wasn't even anything over the average cute young chick - I had friends who were drop dead gorgeous and a lot of them quit jobs because of workplace harassment. They got other jobs - they just quit working where there was no respect for them. It pretty much sucks when it gets so bad that you don't even know you're safe at your job. Either the laws have had a really good effect or guys just don't harass women that are old enough to be their grandmother. LOL.

      As far as other women -- I'd rather deal with the men. It drives me crazy that women get completely bent out of shape if their husbands or boyfriends so much as speak to you. Why is it that they think that just because they found the dweeb attractive, everyone wants him? That's one thing that seems to get worse as I age instead of better.

      As far as the woman in the pic - I think she's adorable, and I can see how she might have a lot of trouble from people at work.
      Sal;

      I love how you handled your boss.
      Yeah, the girl is cute. And she's small..and looks vulnerable. There is a certain type of man that really really likes that. So, yeah, I can see her getting bothered. And women don't have to be gorgeous to be hassled. Sometimes it's just numbers. If there are 9 men in the office, and one woman..likely, she will feel extra attention because she's a woman.


      And about women and men getting jealous...even when they are older?
      Absolutely. When I sold in people's homes...I never looked at a wife except directly in the face, no matter how old she was. It didn't matter what she looked like. Husbands get jealous. And wives get mad when their husband looks at another woman for more than a glance.

      My first wife would get mad if there was an attractive woman in the room. I didn't even have to look at her or talk to her. And it would take me an hour to figure out what made her mad. Weird.
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      • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
        Originally Posted by Claude Whitacre View Post

        My first wife would get mad if there was an attractive woman in the room. I didn't even have to look at her or talk to her. And it would take me an hour to figure out what made her mad. Weird.
        Claude, you have to understand that devilishly handsome gentlemen such as ourselves bring out the insecurities in the women around us. They're always waiting for a younger model to swoop in and steal us away.

        Of course, it probably doesn't help that I tell my wife that she has nothing to worry about for the time being. My future second wife is probably only in middle school right now. The wife has years to go before she should be concerned.
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      • Profile picture of the author Kay King
        As Sal pointed out - this isn't new. I've known women in the past who were totally frustrated by the sexual comments - and others who were more than willing to go along to get along.

        Depending on the man's true attitude (some men make the comments just because they think men are supposed to do that or women expect it) I either laughed at them or gave them a cold, firm "back off, Jack".

        One great job I had was with a military broker and much of my work was one-on-one meetings with top level executives and some military personnel - often over dinner or drinks. My solution there was to wear a gold band. The moment the man got "suggestive" I would smile gently and say "I believe in monogamy" and hold up my hand with the ring on it. It stopped them in their tracks and we got back to business. I wasn't married - but it worked.

        In the mid-90s I was intervewing for a new job. I wore slacks, blouse and jacket to the interview and the discussion went well....right up until the boss offered me the job. His comment was "I like my girls to wear skirts - the shorter, the better". I turned down the job offer.

        I pulled that old ring out again when I first worked in the casino - there's nothing sillier than a wannabe gambler who thinks a dealer shows up for work just to flirt with him or meet him after hours. Yeah, right. :p


        EDIT: Just talked to a young woman who gave me some insight on this issue. She pointed out that previous generations of women knew they had no protections from harassment in the workplace - and were more likely to prepare themselves for that happening.

        She said her generation (20's) has a different acceptable dress code where push-up bras and tight clothing is the norm. At the same time she thought women today did not expect workplace problems because they think "the law" and "the govt" protects them. I found her view interesting....and after talking to her I felt like a fossil.
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        • Profile picture of the author seasoned
          Originally Posted by Kay King View Post

          As Sal pointed out - this isn't new. I've known women in the past who were totally frustrated by the sexual comments - and others who were more than willing to go along to get along.

          Depending on the man's true attitude (some men make the comments just because they think men are supposed to do that or women expect it) I either laughed at them or gave them a cold, firm "back off, Jack".

          One great job I had was with a military broker and much of my work was one-on-one meetings with top level executives and some military personnel - often over dinner or drinks. My solution there was to wear a gold band. The moment the man got "suggestive" I would smile gently and say "I believe in monogamy" and hold up my hand with the ring on it. It stopped them in their tracks and we got back to business. I wasn't married - but it worked.

          In the mid-90s I was intervewing for a new job. I wore slacks, blouse and jacket to the interview and the discussion went well....right up until the boss offered me the job. His comment was "I like my girls to wear skirts - the shorter, the better". I turned down the job offer.

          I pulled that old ring out again when I first worked in the casino - there's nothing sillier than a wannabe gambler who thinks a dealer shows up for work just to flirt with him or meet him after hours. Yeah, right. :p


          EDIT: Just talked to a young woman who gave me some insight on this issue. She pointed out that previous generations of women knew they had no protections from harassment in the workplace - and were more likely to prepare themselves for that happening.

          She said her generation (20's) has a different acceptable dress code where push-up bras and tight clothing is the norm. At the same time she thought women today did not expect workplace problems because they think "the law" and "the govt" protects them. I found her view interesting....and after talking to her I felt like a fossil.
          WOW, talk about NANNY GOVERNMENT! In OTHER words, they feel it is OK to do ANYTHING and even have sex with a group and simply claim harassment.

          HECK, the generation that preceded MINE, had women that had occasions to wear things such as she described. Has she EVER seen 60 shows? And her father may even be the same age I am! So yep folks, her *****GRANDMOTHER***** could have been a "beach bunny"!

          BTW I LOVE the way YOU handled such things. And they obviously had RESPECT for the idea!

          Steve
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  • Profile picture of the author bizgrower
    I figure Warrior Women are Too Pretty To Work, but they do.

    And, yeah, IMO she is pretty. Probably end up being some workplace consultant.

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  • Profile picture of the author Kroncept
    *Fists/Jaw clenched*
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  • Profile picture of the author HeySal
    Kay - sexual harassment is taken with extreme seriousness today.

    When I was around 47 I still looked around 30. I had a boss that tried to get me to go out with him. I ignored it. He would holler crude remarks across the patio on break if I was talking to a guy. He tried to keep me from a promotion which would take me out of his department -- I ignored all of it.

    Then he started going 30 miles out of his way to drive back and forth in front of my house. I told him to knock it off so he put in a complaint that I kissed my boyfriend goodbye on company property -- which all the married people did if they were picked up by spouses for lunch or dropped off at work in the morning. So I went into our HR office and put in a complaint. I told them that if he didn't stop, I'd call the police - it's one thing to be an ass at work, but stalking wasn't going to go over. They handled it right away. Afterward I had to sign a statement that I felt they did a satisfactory job of curtailing the problem. Actually, though - it was a woman at the head of HR and she was horrified when I told her he was driving back and forth in front of my house. Not sure if a man would have reacted as she did, but I'm thinking it would have been close. Also not sure if it would have been taken so seriously if he hadn't resorted to stalking. It was put on my record though and I was asked about the incident in interviews with subsequent companies.
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    Sal
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    • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
      Originally Posted by HeySal View Post


      Then he started going 30 miles out of his way to drive back and forth in front of my house. it was a woman at the head of HR and she was horrified when I told her he was driving back and forth in front of my house. Not sure if a man would have reacted as she did, but I'm thinking it would have been close.
      Stalking is dangerous. That means he's obsessed with you. A man in HR may have taken the rest of it lightly, but the "driving in front of my house" thing is overboard for everyone. I had a friend who met a girl once and started telling me and a group of friends about how he would drive by her house trying to film her. I guess he thought it would sound cool to us. About six guys (all of us) told him in no uncertain terms that it was unacceptable behavior, and that we would turn him in if he didn't stop. He just couldn't believe that we reacted that way.

      Oh, and I've had two woman stalkers. One kept sending me flowers, hoping my wife would get angry and leave me...and the other kept showing up at my store. I didn't think too much about it until she started getting there before I did, and asked me where I spent the night.

      She said "Are you mad at me for asking where you spent the night?" I said "No. You're a valuable customer. I wouldn't get angry. How you spend your time is your business". I realized then that she wanted me to be angry...because then she would consider that a relationship.

      She asked me once "Does your wife get jealous of me stopping by?" I said "No. Every time you stop by, I tell her all about it. She's not the jealous type, and I'm not the straying type." I could have been more direct, I suppose. She even invited her uncles and aunts to meet her at my store. I think she told them I was her boyfriend. Weird. Eventually, she got angry about something, and never came back.

      It is different for a woman.

      I had an office with about a dozen salesman working for me. Some were married, and all were in heir twenties. A new rep was hired, she was stunning, married, and smart as a whip.

      After about three days of the guys ogling her and making crude comments, I sent her on an errand (I know how that sounds, but hear me out)..

      All the guys were there. I kind of lost my temper, and told them that the first time she complains, the guy will be fired. I told them that they were acting like two year olds, and that I wouldn't tolerate it. When she came back, she didn't know what happened. One guy was crying (I was pretty rough on them), and I sent him home.

      Unfortunately she had to move out of the area because of her husband's work. She was a strong woman who could have taken care of this herself, I'm sure. But she shouldn't have to.
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    • Profile picture of the author seasoned
      Originally Posted by HeySal View Post

      Kay - sexual harassment is taken with extreme seriousness today.

      When I was around 47 I still looked around 30. I had a boss that tried to get me to go out with him. I ignored it. He would holler crude remarks across the patio on break if I was talking to a guy. He tried to keep me from a promotion which would take me out of his department -- I ignored all of it.

      Then he started going 30 miles out of his way to drive back and forth in front of my house. I told him to knock it off so he put in a complaint that I kissed my boyfriend goodbye on company property -- which all the married people did if they were picked up by spouses for lunch or dropped off at work in the morning. So I went into our HR office and put in a complaint. I told them that if he didn't stop, I'd call the police - it's one thing to be an ass at work, but stalking wasn't going to go over. They handled it right away. Afterward I had to sign a statement that I felt they did a satisfactory job of curtailing the problem. Actually, though - it was a woman at the head of HR and she was horrified when I told her he was driving back and forth in front of my house. Not sure if a man would have reacted as she did, but I'm thinking it would have been close. Also not sure if it would have been taken so seriously if he hadn't resorted to stalking. It was put on my record though and I was asked about the incident in interviews with subsequent companies.
      WOW! At least in the 80s, speaking of such things about an employee was AGAINST THE LAW!

      Steve
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      • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
        Hmmmm, but the attractive thing can go against you as well?

        I am considered attractive, becomes obvious after a while, and l was finding a new recruitment agency, (finding work).

        I walked into one that was convenient, and the secretary, who was an attractive blonde, (just as attractive, or more so than the one above) treated me in a harsh tone.

        A bit like she had the worst day of her life, and decided to jump down my throat. She answered my questions, and got someone, but did it in a l hate your guts, kind of way.

        I couldn't figure it out, l'd never seen this woman before, or stepped into this office before.


        But then, after she had got someone for me, then talked to some old guy, who looked like a homeless person just off the street, and she was as sweet as pie to him????


        Later on, l was glad they didn't accept me, as l wouldn't have signup with them; last thing l needed is a bitchy secretary!


        Shane

        PS l am Male, late forties, but l look much younger!
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        • Profile picture of the author seasoned
          Originally Posted by tagiscom View Post

          Hmmmm, but the attractive thing can go against you as well?

          I am considered attractive, becomes obvious after a while, and l was finding a new recruitment agency, (finding work).

          I walked into one that was convenient, and the secretary, who was an attractive blonde, (just as attractive, or more so than the one above) treated me in a harsh tone.

          A bit like she had the worst day of her life, and decided to jump down my throat. She answered my questions, and got someone, but did it in a l hate your guts, kind of way.

          I couldn't figure it out, l'd never seen this woman before, or stepped into this office before.


          But then, after she had got someone for me, then talked to some old guy, who looked like a homeless person just off the street, and she was as sweet as pie to him????


          Later on, l was glad they didn't accept me, as l wouldn't have signup with them; last thing l needed is a bitchy secretary!


          Shane

          PS l am Male, late forties, but l look much younger!
          Maybe it was the time, something else that happened earlier, or she wanted to show pity to the down and out. Somtimes strangers thought I was someone else, and treated me badly.

          Steve
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          • Profile picture of the author Daniel Evans
            It doesn't matter how the story is swang.

            Ultimately she's still drawing attention to her looks.
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            • Profile picture of the author Kay King
              At least in the 80s, speaking of such things about an employee was AGAINST THE LAW!
              A lot of employers hadn't gotten the message yet - well into the 90's. One reason was pursuing a charge of harassment was much more difficult than people believed at the time. A woman had to prove she had a case before she could make a charge - and it's not always an easy thing to "prove".
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              • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
                Maybe it was the time, something else that happened earlier, or she wanted to show pity to the down and out. Somtimes strangers thought I was someone else, and treated me badly.

                Steve
                Yep, someone who looked like me may have killed her family off? But l still find it weird!

                Shane
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                • Profile picture of the author pickthat apple
                  Let's put it this way...if she was a Haifa Wehbe I could believe her...
                  but she is not, really...
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  • Profile picture of the author HeySal
    I love guy's reasoning "why does she try to be pretty then?" Why shouldn't a woman be pretty? You want YOUR woman to be pretty - but you think we have to dress down to look like bag ladies or ogres so men can control their hormones? F*** that, dudes. If a woman wants to, and can, look like a goddess, that's her pleasure - and not your right to feel that just because you are attracted, that it's a man's right to harass or touch. Live with it. You are responsible for your own actions and a beautiful woman shouldn't have to worry about her safety just because you think you can pawn it off as her fault.

    I have a killer midrift - If and when I want to show it I will. Someone has a problem with understanding that they aren't allowed to touch unless I'm willing..........then get ready to have your nuts ripped out through your nose. Grow the f*** up. You all want to be "big men" yet you're stating you can't be responsible, or don't have to be, if a woman looks a certain way? Go home, your mamma didn't finish raising you. It will be a cold day from hell before I ever look dumpy because some overgrown juvenile delinquent can't handle his own actions.

    Claude - I like you more every time you open your mouth -- but I won't show up at your store. Promise.
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    • Profile picture of the author Daniel Evans
      Pigeon holing anyone and everyone based upon gender alone is sexism within itself.

      Anyone then who defends their own gender by slating the other in reponse to such a case is hypocritical in their arugment.


      Daniel
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    • Profile picture of the author seasoned
      Originally Posted by HeySal View Post

      I love guy's reasoning "why does she try to be pretty then?"
      If you are referring to what I said, I said "If she thinks she is SO pretty, why does she spend so much to help."

      Steve
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      • Profile picture of the author tagiscom
        I have a killer midrift - If and when I want to show it I will. Someone has a problem with understanding that they aren't allowed to touch unless I'm willing..........then get ready to have your nuts ripped out through your nose. Grow the f*** up. You all want to be "big men" yet you're stating you can't be responsible, or don't have to be, if a woman looks a certain way? Go home, your mamma didn't finish raising you. It will be a cold day from hell before I ever look dumpy because some overgrown juvenile delinquent can't handle his own actions.
        Probably explains, why some countries tell there women to wear a sheet over their body's!

        Although when they immigrate, they can blame the woman for their loss of control, because of the lack of clothing!

        As you are saying, feeble excuse for being a low human.

        They should go on Dr Phill!

        Shane
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  • Profile picture of the author Beverley Boorer
    she's gonna get a shock when she gets old and wrinkled, has no job or money and no mum to support her. Maybe she'll try an online business
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    • Profile picture of the author Claude Whitacre
      We tend to want to make fun of people who are rich, or beautiful, or popular.

      But we all have a way we want to be thought of.
      Some women really care a lot about how attractive they are.
      So do some guys.
      Some women want to be perceived as strong, and in control...just like some guys.

      Some guys want to be thought of as tough, strong, talented, brilliant...
      We all have a way we would like to be perceived.

      Some people's lives revolve around how devoted they are to a church, or a cause. Some think being a parent is their whole world.

      A few only care about their business, and really nothing else.

      We all see life through a different lens. If the lady in the article cares deeply about how she looks, that's her business. I just wonder how they found her for the article and interview.

      And by the way, I'm 58 years old, and could pass for 57. If I wear a hat....
      and hold in my stomach.
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