Landing page feedback needed

11 replies
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#feedback #landing #needed #page
  • Profile picture of the author jtchaschowy
    Don't have time to delve into it right now but first thing that came to mind is removing the background as it is distracting.
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    • Profile picture of the author netmatrix
      Don't make your visitors scroll to view your most important information...

      Header: A lot of empty space, consolidate the design.

      Image: Same issue as the header.

      "6 Reasons"/Form: Should be above the fold and instantly visible when someone visits your site.
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  • Profile picture of the author MelanieandMiles
    Agreed on the background being a bit distracting as well as the huge chunk of white(-ishgreen) space in the header image... It pulls the eye away from your message.

    I'd move the container all the way to the top of the page, remove the excess space in the header and also excess space in the main graphic... With those tweaks you should be able to get more, if not all, of your form showing above the fold.

    I'd also remove at least 2 of the fields in the form... Possibly get it down to just the email.

    Also you kind of have two calls to action which can be a bit confusing... At the top you tell them to call for a demo and right below that you are telling them to fill out the form to get started.... Which is it.... Fill out the form or call?

    Also, the arrow line doesn't really point to anything... And, what does 'our team will get right on it' mean? Consider more specific text that actually tells them what will happen when they fill out the form. Do they receive the free demo instantly via email?

    You are definitely on the right track... Remember, clean and simple WORKS! If you de-clutter things a bit and move everything up more and refine your call to action to only 1 option, I think you'll see a better response.

    But then again, what do we know? lol. You could always leave that version as is, make a 2nd clean and simple version, then split test them so you have statistical evidence about what works best for your target market.

    Keep up the great work, tho... Progress happens one step at a time!
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  • Profile picture of the author Jason Kanigan
    I looked at this in the morning and went away to think about it.

    That blurry image of the classroom/office is very distracting.

    The color scheme didn't work for me.

    However, what is working is that what you are offering is very clear.
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  • Profile picture of the author dave147
    oh yeah change that blurry image, otherwise it is good!
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  • Profile picture of the author WillR
    You already posted this in the mobile marketing section.
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  • Profile picture of the author TheBigBee
    Originally Posted by tkhowse View Post

    I'm looking for feedback on this new landing page for a company that sells custom mobile apps.

    Results at Hand
    The blurry photo is actually quite brilliant. You are gaining precious milliseconds of attention there. Think about it, people's eyes are forced to focus there longer. You can use that to your advantage. You should use that space to convey some solid information.

    I would...

    1. Change the line from "Simple mobile apps to wow your attendees" to a statement that says what it does. What causes the wow factor? Suppose it's the thought of apples. Then; Our simple mobile apps give your {conference} attendees apples.
    2. Below the main headline, state a strong benefit from having "wowed" those attendees... Now you have given the reader incentive to scroll down and read more.
    3. For your review section, I would restructure your reviews to include the name + AN IMAGE of the "person" aligned to the LEFT side.
    4. Try to get some testimonials that speak to some very specific things people were able to do with the app. Start with the attendees (if there any - no offense). Call them up, do a survey, ask for testimonial.
    5. This is a really minor thing, but don't take my word for it, test it. Change the color of your phone number and make it more prominent.
    6. I wouldn't use the word "DEMO" in my call to action. Calling for Demo is inviting them to call you to get a sales pitch (is what they may be thinking). "Call To Get It Now!" or something like that should settle it.
    7. Give them a reason to fill out the form. You are telling them to just fill out the form. Do you have anything to offer them for filling out the form other than a demo?
    8. 6 Reasons to love our mobile apps - sounds like you're telling people to love them, and now allowing them to love them... "Why people love us..." should suffice.
    9. Consolidate those 6 reasons to 3. Your Landing page is a presentation, and great presenters convey points in clusters of three. When you have to struggle to add reasons - it means your product is no good.
    10. A solution like UberTransfers™ should help you convert more people by handling the form to phone stuff.


    These are the things I would do if I were focused on conversion optimization of the page.
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  • Profile picture of the author FreeLeadsKING
    I agree with some of the comments above but I think a Video will go a long way here and I would place it inside a iphone or android image.
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    • Profile picture of the author TheBigBee
      Originally Posted by FreeLeadsKING View Post

      I agree with some of the comments above but I think a Video will go a long way here and I would place it inside a iphone or android image.
      Yup! Absolutely!!! Here's the thing, for a tech start up it has to be animated / presentation style, and it has to be awesome! I will stop there for not to self promote...
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  • Profile picture of the author vndnbrgj
    Not....

    Why? Well, you are selling a "mobile" solution.
    However, your site isn't mobile friendly.

    That's like joining a gym, where the personal trainers are fat.
    Would you buy training from those personal trainers?
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    • Profile picture of the author ewenmack
      I told the poster on the Copywriting Forum
      that he doesn't know who the buyer is.

      It certainly isn't the attendees.

      Needs to really get that part nailed
      so buyers know it's exactly for them.

      Best,
      Ewen
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