Critique my copy: VSL about creating online courses

by vaidab
4 replies
I'd love a general feedback on this. The course is designed for educators and trainers interested in launching their first online course. Traffic source: online course marketplace (think Udemy).
I've intentionally left out the guarantee, price and testimonials as it depends from marketplace to marketplace and I'd rather have static content in the video. They are present in the written format that will go together with the video.

Have you ever thought about generating passive revenue by leveraging your skills and experience?
How about working from home, at your own pace and on your own schedule while also having the flexibility to do whatever you want through your day?
All of this, without needing anything more than a smartphone? (And to be honest, not even that!)

Did you know that 20 000 online instructors are doing exactly that? And that's the number present on only one of the dozens online course marketplaces!
Very few of these instructors share their secrets, secrets like the ones I'm going to share with you in this letter.

But before I do that, let me introduce myself.

It wasn't that long ago when I worked as a programmer in a small city at an even smaller startup. I was working 2 jobs, constantly having to balance my very full professional life with an almost empty personal one.

Around that time I was studying the field of time management in order to be more productive both at work and at home. I learned some pretty good techniques and one night, I recorded myself teaching one such technique using a very old smartphone, an iPhone 3GS.

I didn't have a clear goal in mind when I did it... I think I just wanted to share it because I was using it a lot and I thought it was very useful.

I had no studio, no professional microphone and this is how I sounded: <video of my first course>

After I heard myself I thought: NO! This is not something I will ever release!
My inner perfectionist was smashing his head on the wall. No way!

I postponed publishing it for one month when at a friend's request (because I was still talking about that technique), I released it publicly (though I gave the link only to him).

2 days later, I get an email from one of his work colleagues asking me where can he find other such techniques. He was successfully using them and wanted more.

I was dumbstruck... But his message motivated me and 3 days later I had a small course consisting of 9 methods on managing time, focus and energy.

I still remember when I released it together with my then new blog on time management.
I got 12 sales and for my first course, with an old iPhone and no other setup, it was way over my expectations!

Fast forward - a few years later, I am working from home designing and helping others design experiential online courses.

My motto is "I teach students how to become their own teachers!" and this is what I'm going to do here. I'm going to show you how you can launch your own online course in only 3 days without any knowhow even if you don't *think* you have the tools to do it.

How do I do that?

I've developed a unique system that, if followed step-by-step, will enable you to record, produce and deliver an online course in a maximum of 3 days without any financial investment.
No bullshit! This template is exactly what me and my fellow instructors are using in delivering online courses and it's fine-tuned to give you the minimum effective dose that you need in order to publish a professional online course.

Introducing Courseology - A proven step-by-step system to launch your online course in 3 days

The curriculum is split in 3 days, each full of chapters that take your hand and guide you through the process needed to launch your course.

Day 1: Planning the adventure of *their* lifetime

o In Chapter 1 you will identify a much needed, highly sought, easily sold topic for your course. You'll be doing this through templates, scoring cards and fill in the blank exercises that will help you quickly pinpoint that sweet spot that you'll be passionately teaching.
o Chapter 2 is all about determining tangible outcomes for your students. Your course is not about the instructor, it's about the student and, in this chapter, you will learn what it takes to make that student happy that he invested in your course.
o Enthralling your audience is done in Chapter 3, where you'll prepare your curriculum on autopilot using a ready-made template. There, you will also choose from 3 very different delivery styles after fully understanding their advantages and disadvantages.

Day 2: Create highly engaging content that mesmerizes your market!

o The second day uses techniques drawn from computer science in order to best leverage your new knowledge. You start light, first thing in the morning, by building an inspiring bio in Chapter 1.
o Warmed up, you continue by producing highly engaging content that mesmerizes your market using all the tools from Chapter 2.
o Finally, the end comes with chapter 3, where you'll learn how to produce a powerful course presentation, in order to convert visitors into loyal customers. Everything is on autopilot, you don't even have to drink your coffee.

Day 3: Produce content that transforms!

o Day 3 is all about delivering. You start by setting a cheap but effective recording studio in Chapter 1. That's if you want to invest a few bucks. If you don't, you have the *free* option.
o Then you learn how to deliver great content in Chapter 2. I'm not a fan of theory, only of applied "science". So after reading how to deliver, you jump straight to recording: 3, 2, 1, Action!
o And your work is done. Chapter 3 is all about choosing the right price and publishing your magnum opus.

All the content comes with practical examples that provide a reality anchor, a way to fully grasp what's behind the teaching. And when you follow the master template, you'll realize it gives you the opportunity (and the push) to create you own videos based on the exact theory taught. You always have everything in order to get to the next step.

The system is project based, which means that you will have to work on your course *while* you watch the materials. That also means that you get your own online course in the 3 days it takes to follow the materials.

Here's what others say about my content:

<2 testimonials>

The course is basically a mentorship package and after only 3 days you have a ready-to-go course that will provide you with passive revenue and all you have to do is click Publish.

Oh, one more thing:

Even though this course is a complete product by itself, I'm constantly adding content to it.
Do you want an interview with serial course creators? Just ask.
Do you want a step by step guide on properly pricing your course? Ask again.
Do you want to know how you can repurpose the content of your course into a written book? I have a guide for that too.

I'm constantly adding bonuses based on requests from my students.
20% of the content was updated after I tested the course with my first 10 students (5 of which have successfully launched their own content in 3 days, 2 others in 5 days).

Developing an online course is the next step in the education system. This particular course was presented at Experiential Educators Europe, at a Toastmasters conference and all over the European continent.

A lot of goodies are unveiled when students interact with me. All I need to know is what you need in order to launch your course and all you need to do is to be there, asking me any question you may have.

Now get inside, build your online course in only 3 days and live a stress free life earning money from your passion!
#copy #courses #creating #critique #online #vsl
  • Profile picture of the author helisell
    I resisted replying for a while.

    I didn't want to be the one to tell you. The copy is ok for a first try but from a not bad start you rambled off into boredom. I remember my first attempt was like this.

    I thought it was mentor was not even remotely interested in all my hard work.

    The copy doesn't excite me enough to be interested in why I should be producing my own training.

    What would be the major benefit to me learning how to do this stuff?
    What would my life be like if I learned how to produce training material with just an iphone?
    Maybe if you described what the major benefit to me would be I might sit up and take notice!

    Your copy need focus.

    What should you focus on...I don't know.

    Making Calls To Sell Something? What are you actually saying?
    Is there any room for improvement? Want to find out?

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  • Profile picture of the author George Sepich
    Take this line from your copy, tighten it up a bit and use it for your headline.. how you can launch your own online course in only 3 days without any knowhow even if you don’t *think* you have the tools to do it.

    Need Help? Digital Marketing Solutions From George Sepich.

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    • Profile picture of the author DABK
      I didn't get far in your copy...

      You need a strong headline.

      All the questions in the first paragraph can be something along the lines of:

      For The Teacher Who Wants Passive Income
      Subtitle: Join the Millions of Teachers Who Work From Home Using What They Already Know... Just in a Different Way

      Generally, you're too vague.

      What is it you're proposing should be clear. So should be who this is for. And concise.
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  • Profile picture of the author max5ty
    Have you read this to a friend?

    Probably not because it sounds canned and mechanical...boring to be honest. Reads like you tried too hard to be a writer and forgot about just keeping it real.

    I tried hard as hell to get this sh!t going and couldn't figure out wtf I was doing wrong. I screwed up so bad till I finally got my head outta my as! and figured it out. Check this out'll love this...

    Ok, you probably won't write like that, but I'd sit and read something like that before I'd sit and read what you have right now.

    Best wishes with your project.
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