My conversions are low despite decent traffic. My headline needs to be beefed up a bit.
I came up with several new headlines and my mentor said, "I am struggling with 2 things common in all of these headlines
- You mention a SYSTEM - which indicates you have something to sell and MIGHT turn people off before you even have the chance to sell them.
- The more I read the words CLINICALLY PROVEN the more I feel that this should be coming from a health professional (which you are not) -- so I fear that the use of those words is sending the wrong message.
Try toning down the product mention and the health implications if you can. This might read better."
Here is my current salespage.
Before I list all of the new headline versions I came up with I wanted to make sure someone was willing to look at them.