Sales copy help

by m30jake

Posted: 15 years ago 13 replies

COPY WRITING

Hi all,

Could you please take a look at my copy that I've written? It only converted 6 people last month which is poor!

Link: removed, pm me

Thanks all!!!!

Jake

#copy #sales

AdwordsMogul 15 years ago

What makes you think it's poor? 6 out of how many?

It appears you asked for tips on this site before, why haven't you applied most of the advice?

Here is a tip: write down 5 things they will be able to do after they pass the exam. eg.
get a job, meet attractive people etc.
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GNR 15 years ago

Quizás podría ayudarte con la página en español. Me enviaste un PM, pero creo que yo no puedo responderlo hasta que no tenga 50 posts.
GNR
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- 2 replies
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- m30jake 15 years ago
  
  pues ponte en contacto con nosotros mediante la pagina de contacto en la web, gracias
  
  Thanks for the tip, however putting in 5 more benefits I dont think it will convert much.
  
  The page last month got 3,000 visits, so 2 conversions in every 1000 which is very poor indeed!!!
  
  Thanks
  
  2 replies
  
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  AdwordsMogul 15 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by m30jake
  
  ...
  Thanks for the tip, however putting in 5 more benefits I dont think it will convert much.
  
  ...
  
  And what are basing your assumption on?
  
  Thanks
  
  Signature
  "Those who can - DO IT. Those who can't, say it's impossible."
  Jean Paul a.k.a AdwordsMogul
  PHPDevelopers.net - Top of the range PHP developers
  
  ⇉ Easy Link Saver - Are you tired of the pain of constantly searching for your affiliate links? ( Chrome extension - FREE )
  
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  GNR 15 years ago
  
  OK, ya me estoy comunicando.
  GNR
  
  Thanks
  
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- m30jake 15 years ago
  
  Thanks
  
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AdwordsMogul 15 years ago

Also, where are you getting your traffic from?

Again, why haven't you applied virtually any of the advice you were given on your earlier posts?
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- 1 reply
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"Those who can - DO IT. Those who can't, say it's impossible."
Jean Paul a.k.a AdwordsMogul
PHPDevelopers.net - Top of the range PHP developers

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- m30jake 15 years ago
  
  Originally Posted by AdwordsMogul
  
  Also, where are you getting your traffic from?
  
  Again, why haven't you applied virtually any of the advice you were given on your earlier posts?
  
  Hi, I've applied most of the advice from the other thread. Maybe the page is stuck in your cache???
  
  Traffic all comes from google. People searching for the First Certificate exam or grammar topics to do with it.
  
  For those of you who do not know what it is:
  
  "The First Certificate in English (FCE) is one of the examinations available from University of Cambridge ESOL Examinations in England. Its possession proves one's adequacy in the English language, and its successful completion means that one is able to interact socially efficiently."
  
  Thanks
  
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m30jake 15 years ago

Any help please guys? I'm really just thinking about giving the whole thing up...
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briancassingena 15 years ago

Hi mate, PM me and I'll take a look asap
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- 1 reply
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- doubleyourpips 15 years ago
  
  hi, everyone!
  i need to correct and finish my sales letter. Who could you help me with that?
  
  Thanks
  
  1 reply
  
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  Hugh Thyer 15 years ago
  
  The big selling idea is that they will pass the exam first time or it's free. Guaranteed. So lead with that. You've identified that's the big selling idea so you need to lead with it.
  
  Thanks
  
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tj0575 15 years ago

Have you thought about changing your headline:

"The Best Way to Prepare Yourself for the First Certificate Grammar Without Stress Or High Costs!"

I have a few other thoughts if you want just pm me.
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