Copywriting Game - Sell It in 250 Words or Less

by Mark Andrews Banned
42 replies
The game rules...

Sell the audience on obscure products - in 250 words or less.

I'll post up an image every now and then and you come up with the engaging and unique sales copy to sell this to market in 250 words or less.

Your first product is a...



As engaging or witty or clever with words as you like...

Who would like to take the plunge by going first?

Mal? Grilled chicken ass? You go boy!...

Show them how it's done...
#250 #copywriting #game #sell #words
  • Profile picture of the author Cam Connor
    Originally Posted by Pete Walker View Post

    The game rules...

    Sell the audience on obscure products - in 250 words or less.

    I'll post up an image every now and then and you come up with the engaging and unique sales copy to sell this to market in 250 words or less.

    Your first product is a...



    As engaging or witty or clever with words as you like...

    Who would like to take the plunge by going first?

    Mal? Grilled chicken ass? You go boy!...

    Show them how it's done...

    Do you want a pet that's so adorable, you could just eat it right up?
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  • Profile picture of the author travlinguy
    Think of this image next time you're in the voting booth and after you puke, leave without voting because they're all just like this bird.

    18 words. Persuasive? Not sure. But it works for me.
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  • Profile picture of the author Alex Ceskavich
    Gives happy smiles to hungry children.

    - Alex
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  • Profile picture of the author SeekingNothing
    "Grow your own Thanksgiving Dinner in a few minutes! Just add water and worthless plant matter!"
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    • Profile picture of the author Mark Andrews
      Banned
      You're supposed to be showcasing your copywriting skills here damn it!

      Blimey, you can lead a horse to water but you can't... yes, yes, yes, we know the rest.

      Benefits, sell the audience on the blinkin' benefits. Why'd ya think I said 250 words or less?

      Copywriters! Nothing but pains in the neck the lot of 'em.

      Now, where's the story?...
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  • Profile picture of the author Mark Andrews
    Banned
    I love you Ken. You've got the idea. (115 words)

    Now the rest of you, follow suit...
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  • Profile picture of the author arfasaira
    Originally Posted by Ken_Caudill View Post

    Earn $17,158.21 in 1 Week --Guaranteed!
    Hot New Opportunity Has Crowds Gawking for Hours


    Rake in thousands of dollars each week as you electrify the public with with astounding turkey feats.

    The Turkey in the Straw Kit comes complete with electric hot plate, 6 pounds of straw, an 18 pound turkey, and a high-definition recording of everyone's favorite song, Turkey in the Straw.

    Here's How it Works:

    • Cover plate with straw.
    • Place turkey on plate
    • Plug the hot plate in.
    • Start recording.
    • Turkey will dance as plate heats up.

    Thousands of people will pay $5 to watch this amazing display of poultry in motion.

    Only 100 of these money-making monsters will be sold.

    Grab yours now for only $197 before they're gone forever.
    AWESOME!!! I'll pop by later and have a go...but thanks for the laugh Ken!!!
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  • Profile picture of the author DougHughes
    Do you delight in the rare and exotic?

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    Note: These are wild (not farm raised) and supplies are limited. Act now to secure your order and start enjoying these rare delights today.
    Signature

    I write copy. Learn More.>>

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    • Profile picture of the author PMinc
      Is Your Son A
      Limp-Wristed "Nancy-Boy?"


      Do you fear his effeminate nature will lead to endless, unbearable torment in the schoolyard?

      How hours do you spend staring at the ceiling in the dead of night, dreading his future pursuit of a career as an "artist" [Read: Salvation Army resident]
      Eliminate all doubt and anxiety TODAY with the...


      "Kill What You Eat"
      Masculinity Building Kit

      Nothing makes a bigger man of young boys than slaughtering animals, and we've set aside our biggest set of turkeys to help your masculinity-challenged lad become a more of a "Conan."

      If you invest in the kit within the next twenty four hours, we'll throw in...

      • A stainless steel axe
      • A royal oak chopping block
      • ...and our exclusive ebook, "25 Reasons Turkeys Want You To Kill Them"


      Signature


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      • Profile picture of the author DougHughes
        Originally Posted by John Breese View Post


        "artist" [Read: Salvation Army resident]
        • "25 Reasons Turkeys Want You To Kill Them"
        Ha...great!
        Signature

        I write copy. Learn More.>>

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        • Profile picture of the author PMinc
          Originally Posted by DougHughes View Post

          Ha...great!
          Cheers Doug!
          Signature


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      • Profile picture of the author Irish Intuition
        Originally Posted by John Breese View Post

        • ...and our exclusive ebook, "25 Reasons Turkeys Want You To Kill Them"

        hahaha... that line alone beats everything. Clever, John
        Signature




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  • Profile picture of the author humbledmarket
    Banned
    Originally Posted by Ken_Caudill View Post

    Earn $17,158.21 in 1 Week --Guaranteed!
    Hot New Opportunity Has Crowds Gawking for Hours


    Rake in thousands of dollars each week as you electrify the public with with astounding turkey feats.

    The Turkey in the Straw Kit comes complete with electric hot plate, 6 pounds of straw, an 18 pound turkey, and a high-definition recording of everyone's favorite song, Turkey in the Straw.

    Here's How it Works:

    • Cover plate with straw.
    • Place turkey on plate
    • Plug the hot plate in.
    • Start recording.
    • Turkey will dance as plate heats up.

    Thousands of people will pay $5 to watch this amazing display of poultry in motion.

    Only 100 of these money-making monsters will be sold.

    Grab yours now for only $197 before they're gone forever.
    May I hire you as my copy writer ;D
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  • Profile picture of the author rapidscc
    Originally Posted by Pete Walker View Post

    The game rules...

    Sell the audience on obscure products - in 250 words or less.

    I'll post up an image every now and then and you come up with the engaging and unique sales copy to sell this to market in 250 words or less.

    Your first product is a...



    As engaging or witty or clever with words as you like...

    Who would like to take the plunge by going first?

    Mal? Grilled chicken ass? You go boy!...

    Show them how it's done...
    Elegance, Beauty, Such Majesty..The Queen of the Farm, a Pet, a Special Treat. Bring Her Home And Enjoy The Highlight of Thanksgiving With The Family!

    Got the headline in..Will come back later to finish the short copy. For the meantime gotta run..
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  • Profile picture of the author AcePlayer
    HONEY I TOLD YOU NOT TO EAT THAT CHICK!


    The Recap..
    TIME: 5 Mins Ago..
    The Greatest Dread of Our Times....
    [Ring... Ring...]



    911 Operator: Ma'am, your husband has been removed from flight XXX to prevent a chicken flu outbreak. He's admitted to eating a bucket full of chickens and is to be taken to airport prison hospital. Your cooperation is appreciated. You may speak to him now.
    SHOCKED? THIS COULD HAPPEN TO YOU!
    Switch to Turkeys. Its Good For You:

    • Be chicken-prison-proof! Don't let your "Loved One" Get Detained At the Airport Because of Chicken Flu!
    • Lean Meat = Lean Body. You've seen the Tubeway adverts!
    • Be treated like a Rock Star on your next trip to country of Turkey! Folks love turkey eaters there...

    PUT A STOP TO:
    Winner.. Winner.. Chicken Dinner!


    Imagine you're in Las Vegas with your buddies, and you win that big hand!
    Do you really want to STILL BE eating chicken wings...?
    When you were dreaming of those YUMMY TURKEY BREASTS all evening!
    Take Action Today. Don't let Mr. and Mrs. Smith leave you behind.



    From the Makers of Heaven's Kitchen...
    No One Does It Like the Turkey Doc Inc.


    A Full Year's Supply Includes:
    • Ranch to House In 24 Hours or Less - We'll send you 2 freshly slaughtered turkeys every week... that's 52 weeks a year!

    • Idiot Proof - Can't cook? No Problem! With our 26 Step-by-Step HQ Recipe Videos by Mordon Pamsey the 3 Michelin Star Chef; your friends and family will be licking their fingers in no time!

    • Free Shipping - Unlike our competitors, we use the best Mars certified refrigerated courier service in the country; which insures that the moisture content of those turkey legs stay intact!

    • Prizes Every Week - Each week 10 lucky draw winners get an all inclusive trip to the Slaughtering House!

    ALL THIS FOR THE LIMITED TIME PRICE OF $997 ONLY!


    To Your Health,
    Saif [The Original Turkey Farmer]

    P.S.: I'm available for hire after finishing my turkey dinner!
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    • Profile picture of the author Mark Andrews
      Banned
      I think you might want to get some more practice in son lol. Not a bad attempt but not brilliant. And 250 words max not 327!

      Okay, one or two good tries above... time to switch out the product.

      Your next product is a...

      Wingsuit.



      What is a wingsuit?

      Here...


      Now, sell it in 250 words or less!

      After you...
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      • Profile picture of the author Cam Connor
        Think that video sells itself Pete.
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  • Profile picture of the author WillDL
    Wingsuit- It lets you @#$%ing fly.

    Please send your check or money order to:

    Daedalus Clothing
    123 Easy Sell Street
    Awesometown, US 12345
    Signature

    Occasionally Relevant.

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  • Profile picture of the author AdwordsMogul
    Originally Posted by Pete Walker View Post


    Your next product is a...

    Wingsuit.


    How about a little Google Adwords copy:

    Signature
    "Those who can - DO IT. Those who can't, say it's impossible."
    Jean Paul a.k.a AdwordsMogul
    PHPDevelopers.net - Top of the range PHP developers

    Easy Link Saver - Are you tired of the pain of constantly searching for your affiliate links? ( Chrome extension - FREE )
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  • Profile picture of the author Arock
    Going on the Chicken Coop Clickbank Theme...

    Build Your Own Turkey Coop!

    Turkeys are one of the most profitable poultry birds on the market. Or perhaps you just need a friend. Turkeys are great companions too.

    Either way, your turkey is going to need a great Turkey Coop.

    And you don't want to hire some so-called professional when you can...Build it YOURSELF.

    SAVE THOUSANDS of Dollars.

    After you have mastered building your own backyard Turkey Coop, turn around and apply those skills building Turkey Coops for your Friends and future Customers.

    There Are BIG $$ in Turkey Coops.

    Click Here to Get Your Turkey Coop Plans (Only $27)...
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    • Profile picture of the author Mark Andrews
      Banned
      Originally Posted by Lutzi View Post

      Going on the Chicken Coop Clickbank Theme...

      Build Your Own Turkey Coop!

      Turkeys are one of the most profitable poultry birds on the market. Or perhaps you just need a friend. Turkeys are great companions too.

      Either way, your turkey is going to need a great Turkey Coop.

      And you don't want to hire some so-called professional when you can...Build it YOURSELF.

      SAVE THOUSANDS of Dollars.

      After you have mastered building your own backyard Turkey Coop, turn around and apply those skills building Turkey Coops for your Friends and future Customers.

      There Are BIG $$ in Turkey Coops.

      Click Here to Get Your Turkey Coop Plans (Only $27)...
      My advice? Don't take up copywriting as a career.

      Originally Posted by Pete Walker View Post

      ...time to switch out the product.

      Your next product is a...

      Wingsuit.



      What is a wingsuit?

      Here...

      ‪Flying human‬‏ - YouTube

      Now, sell it in 250 words or less!

      After you...
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  • Profile picture of the author RefundHost
    Would not bother with this one.
    Not many people BUYING live turkeys
    so that makes it a waste of time.

    Even those who are buying live ones
    intend to have it become a meal,
    so this is simply the wrong photo.

    But you guys can have fun wondering
    why even the best copy won't actually
    perform for you.
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    • Profile picture of the author RefundHost
      Originally Posted by Ken_Caudill View Post

      Always good to hear from experts on the turkey market.

      I am awed.
      Anything that people are not buying is "a live turkey".
      That's a very old expression to describe something people don't want.

      Most of the people here don't understand and need to be told about 100 times before they truly understand the essence of sales success.

      Only you know for sure whether or not you are one of them
      but I know you missed the essence of my post
      and I would not be surprised if that is the essence ( and punchline )
      of this thread - "don't waste time on live turkeys"
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      • Profile picture of the author Mark Andrews
        Banned
        Originally Posted by RefundHost View Post

        Anything that people are not buying is "a live turkey".
        That's a very old expression to describe something people don't want.

        Most of the people here don't understand and need to be told about 100 times before they truly understand the essence of sales success.

        Only you know for sure whether or not you are one of them
        but I know you missed the essence of my post
        and I would not be surprised if that is the essence ( and punchline )
        of this thread - "don't waste time on live turkeys"
        No, you're wrong. Doesn't matter, no big deal.

        Let's just switch out the product again...

        Remember folks you can have fun on this forum - although there is a serious bent to this thread too.

        Right, here you go you motley lot...

        A tin of...


        250 words or less please...

        ...(and no more bloody turkeys!)
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        • Profile picture of the author Cam Connor
          [DELETED]
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            • Profile picture of the author Tina Golden
              Fast, cheap and effective way to...

              Get Rid Of The House Guest
              From Hell


              Dear Friend,

              I was once where you are today, with a mother-in-law in the guest bedroom for weeks on end...

              • Nitpicking me constantly
              • Telling my wife what a bum I am
              • Eating me out of house and home
              • Taking over the remote control
              Emasculation was the woman's middle name and she just
              Wouldn't Go Away


              I tried everything.

              I even came out and told her to leave but she didn't listen.

              And then I discovered the secret...

              Heinz Baked Beans

              For less than $10, you can get rid of your house guest from Hell - within 72 hours!

              Eat one large tin of these every night and by the third day, your unwanted and annoying guest will vacate the premises - probably holding their nose and at a dead run!

              BUY NOW ONLY $9.97
              Signature
              Discover how to have fabulous, engaging content with
              Fast & Easy Content Creation
              ***Especially if you don't have enough time, money, or just plain HATE writing***
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              • Profile picture of the author Mark Andrews
                Banned
                You know Tina, I've just been watching the news here in the UK for the past couple of hours and I feel really, really sad.

                What's happening right now all over London with countless huge arson attacks as I write this, it's really depressing. And not just London but now Birmingham, Liverpool and Bristol too.

                But you did make me smile. Thanks for the laugh.

                You are golden.

                Thank you so much.

                Keep 'em coming...
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        • Profile picture of the author JDArchitecture

          Not Just For Breakfast Anymore!
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  • Profile picture of the author RefundHost
    Well THAT ONE you'd need to only sell to people in Australia
    where Heinz has the #1 selling baked bean and sells less than
    10,000 bottles of ketchup per year and because in North America
    Heinz means Ketchup.

    My competency in sales and copy extends to my awareness that
    I probably could not write localized copy for Australians because
    I do not know the local lingo and expressions well enough to be
    sure my words are effective and won't insult anyone.

    wut i'm sayin' is ..... I would not be as stupid as the Harvard Grads
    at Chevrolet who took the #1 selling car in North America ( Chevy Nova )
    and spent a billion dollars to launch it in South America where everyone
    spoke Spanish.

    Unfortunately, they did not sell a single car after about 6 months of TV ads.

    As it turns out, in Spanish, "Nova" means "No go" "Doesn't Work" "Crappy" etc.

    So - anyone selling Heinz baked beans and who is not in Australia - good luck to you.
    Anyone writing the copy who is not Australian will also have difficulty and possibly
    cause LOSS of sales.

    Sorry to rain on the parade - but - there are a few pretty important points to it all:

    1 Good copy begins with understanding the target.
    and
    2 Fight battles you can win. ( don't sell what nobody is buying (here))
    and
    3 Do no harm. ( Advertising this in North America would actually COST Heinz money
    through LOSS from depositioning them as the #1 Ketchup with brand confusion )

    ANY "copywriter" who bothered to post copy failed at at least one of the above
    and perhaps that is why they have time to post so often here on WF ( ?? )
    Something to think about.
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  • Profile picture of the author Tedel
    What a great funny thread. Thanks for the laughs.
    Signature
    Author of Heptagrama. PM for my SEO service offer.
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  • Profile picture of the author WD Mino
    Tina:
    That's some funny stuff girl

    Attention: All Campers who have woken up cold

    "Breakthrough Innovation now saves you from that freezing night air, allowing you to wake up refreshed and invigorated"

    Dear camper.

    I got so tired and ticked off with going camping with the family and waking up just freezing. I would sleep terribly and wake up like a bear that got his canine busted off.

    If you are anything like me you know how frustrating that can be. Well I have good news! Through months of investigation ,and trials We have found the secret to that camping experience we all long for. Nice warm cuddly restful sleep you could be in a blizzard and not even feel it. Now that is powerful!

    Introducing....


    HEINZ BAKED BEANS

    It'll keep ya warm and keep the bears away


    -WD
    Signature

    "As a man thinks in his heart so is he-Proverbs 23:7"
    Coming Soon http://graphicsdon.com

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  • Profile picture of the author WD Mino
    @Refund
    do you understand this is for fun?

    Lighten up pal life is short
    Signature

    "As a man thinks in his heart so is he-Proverbs 23:7"
    Coming Soon http://graphicsdon.com

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    • Profile picture of the author Tina Golden
      LOL, Will - love this line:

      It'll keep ya warm and keep the bears away
      Signature
      Discover how to have fabulous, engaging content with
      Fast & Easy Content Creation
      ***Especially if you don't have enough time, money, or just plain HATE writing***
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  • Profile picture of the author Daniel Sanchez
    Originally Posted by Pete Walker View Post





    Can You Make Dinner From This Turkey?


    What if it meant your survival?


    Only 1 in 87 people answered yes when asked if they could clean a live turkey.

    Why Am I sharing this with you?

    Because after years of living surrounded by grocery stores and expensive appliances...

    I didn't know squat when it came to living off the land at my uncles wilderness acreage.

    None of my fancy education or even years of "being a camper" showed me how to truly live off the land.

    Now you might think this was no big deal...

    But once you discover how to live off the land -

    The anxiety...the insecurity and fear of not being able to get through life's tough times dissolves overnight.

    You feel free, stronger and capable of taking on any challenge. Your life becomes more meaningful.

    My great uncle - a life long farmer, professional animal tracker and backwoods survival expert put together the greatest wilderness survival / self-reliance program in the world.

    He'll share with you:

    • How to survive on any wilderness terrain without ANYTHING ON YOU (Even without clothes!)
    • 100% Foolproof ways to track, catch and clean any animal from squirrel to bear any time of the year
    • PLUS your complete guide to living off the land - from building your own house to growing your own food.

    And so much more!

    You'll get 32 DVDs and 578 pg manual
    for a low limited time "test the market" special of $167 +s/h

    No question asked 365 Day 100% Satisfaction Guarantee


    Call NOW 1-555-555-5555 to get your copy today!





    Ad done. 250 on the dot.

    See if you can spot all of the copywriting / persuasion elements in this post.
    Signature

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  • Profile picture of the author tpw
    I guess my first contribution was too racy... Judge for yourself... See it here...

    Following is my new contribution:





    Memories

    Of A Time When Life Was
    Full Of Hope And Promise...

    ...When You Were A Baby, Your
    Mother Dreamed Of Your Potential
    To Do Great Things In The World...





    When you finally grew to adulthood and got your first job, "Hope" had left her vocabulary, as the only word she could substitute was "Relief" that you had finally moved out of her basement....





    Having heard rumors that you had found a girlfriend and got engaged, your mother felt more "Relief" that someone else would finally take responsibility for you and your wasted life...

    Do you remember your mom's surprise and despair when you gave her a grandbaby of her own?





    Then your mom was never told why your wife left you...





    Or why you and your mom received Christmas cards for the last 25 years that charted the growth of your son, with images like this:





    Ah The Memories...

    Your mom passed on a couple years ago...

    The nurse had said it was strange... Your mom was heard to say as she passed on, "D-E-A-T-H, Oh what a 'relief' it is..."

    Then you lost your job, and now you make peanuts "writing code" for customers on Fiverr...


    We Know Times Are Tight, But May We Recommend...

    Stepping up to:




    Not only does it taste better, but it is also cheaper than what you have been eating for the last two years...





    Heinz Baked Beans
    Make Dinner Half-Enjoyable Again!!



    .
    Signature
    Bill Platt, Oklahoma USA, PlattPublishing.com
    Publish Coloring Books for Profit (WSOTD 7-30-2015)
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  • Profile picture of the author rapidscc
    LOL Bill, you've got a good one here. Convert it to video and it might go viral.
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