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Neighbor Stealing Mail - Need Site or Phoneline to Prove it

by bionictortoise
26 replies
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Hi,

Sadly I share a front door with my neighbor, who is not a nice person. Here in the UK our mail is pushed through a letterbox in the front door; not put in a mailbox.

I suspected he was stealing my mail, but the other week I deliberately left some unimportant mail for myself on the floor behind the front door. And when I came home it was gone.

So as DVDs had gone missing in the past, I put an unimportant DVD in an old Lovefilm envelope to myself, and sure enough that went missing too.

I called the police, and they said; even though I know the mail is gone, it does not provide them with any proof that he has it. They say; for all they know, I could have a vendetta against him and be lying!

I'm trained in Graphic design and have a decent color laser printer. I can make any letter look official.

So I'm thinking I can create a letter to myself with an irresistable offer, and either have him call a number, and leave a message with his name and address (my preferred method, as an audio would be good evidence), or a webpage where he has to fill out a form to get the goodies.

But what goodies would be irresistable to him?

And how do I set up the phone system? I'd prefer to use a paid service, as I don't want to use my private numbers. And so I can have an automated message play when he calls.

He's a convicted thief and there's not much he won't do for money, and he's not got a car at the moment. So I'm thinking a Car competition would be good.

He also stolen a smartphone from me, lots of DVDs and personal letters, bank statements, etc - none of which I can prove.

Does anyone have any ideas of how to get hard evidence on this horrible neighbor?

Thanks a lot
#mail #neighbor #phoneline #prove #site #stealing
  • Profile picture of the author Jack Gordon
    How about a hidden camera instead? It would be an awful lot less work, and probably all that would be necessary.
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    • Profile picture of the author lanfear63
      How much does it cost to rent a PO box so you collect it yourself with a key?

      I would remove myself from the situation, especially if I was only renting.

      Edit: The Psychic Riffle was reading my mind and was a bit quicker on the submit button
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      • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
        Originally Posted by lanfear63 View Post

        How much does it cost to rent a PO box so you collect it yourself with a key?

        I would remove myself from the situation, especially if I was only renting.

        Edit: The Psychic Riffle was reading my mind and was a bit quicker on the submit button
        You're turning into my wife: saying the exact same thing as I just said, only using more words to do so.
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  • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
    Get a PO Box until you can move.
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  • Profile picture of the author bionictortoise
    Thanks guys, but I already have both of those. The surveillance system cannot pick out the address on the envelope, so if it showed him picking up an envelope, he could say it's addressed to him.

    And whether the post gets delievered or put in my PO box depends on whether the stand-in postman reads the instructions at the sorting office.

    Sometimes they don't bother. I am paying nearly £300 a year for this service too!

    This same man poisoned my dog - I want him prosecuted.

    Thanks for the alternative advice but I would still like help setting up a phone line or webpage, or more ideas on how to get him prosecuted please.
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    • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
      Originally Posted by bionictortoise View Post

      Thanks guys, but I already have both of those. The surveillance system cannot pick out the address on the envelope, so if it showed him picking up an envelope, he could say it's addressed to him.

      And whether the post gets delievered or put in my PO box depends on whether the stand-in postman reads the instructions at the sorting office.

      Sometimes they don't bother. I am paying nearly £300 a year for this service too!

      This same man poisoned my dog - I want him prosecuted.

      Thanks for the alternative advice but I would still like help setting up a phone line or webpage, or more ideas on how to get him prosecuted please.
      You're potentially starting a game you can't win. These things escalate quickly and, from what you're saying, there's no telling how your neighbor will respond if he catches wind of what you're up to - which is at least as likely to happen as you successfully duping him. You sound like you have a moral compass. He does not. That does not bode well for you.

      I'm not sure how the UK postal system works. Do you have postal authorities you can make a report to? If so, their standard of evidence may be more lax than the police.
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      • Profile picture of the author butters
        Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post


        I'm not sure how the UK postal system works. Do you have postal authorities you can make a report to? If so, their standard of evidence may be more lax than the police.
        Theoretically it is against the law for anyone other than the designated person on the letter to open someone else's mail.
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        • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
          Originally Posted by butters View Post

          Theoretically it is against the law for anyone other than the designated person on the letter to open someone else's mail.
          I assumed as much, but the OP didn't have much luck with the police. In the States, we have postal investigators that handle mail theft. I don't know if you have a similar arm to your postal service.
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          • Profile picture of the author butters
            Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

            I assumed as much, but the OP didn't have much luck with the police. In the States, we have postal investigators that handle mail theft. I don't know if you have a similar arm to your postal service.
            Not to my knowledge, probably is but not sure. Just start loading disks or usbs with viruses on which melt hard drives when uploaded, that'll teach him.
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      • Profile picture of the author discrat
        Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

        You're potentially starting a game you can't win.

        I
        Yep I agree. You can't win or get back at a Psychopath. .
        Its not gonna happen...J
        just ask Claude
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  • Profile picture of the author butters
    Call him out...? Seems like a simple way to solve the problem. Knock on his door, say, we are the only two who live here, why are you taking my mail? I left mail there on purpose and now its gone, it isn't like a cat comes in and eats it... If that don't work, start putting down thousands of envelopes, go to the next level, go to the extreme!!
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    • Profile picture of the author bionictortoise
      Originally Posted by butters View Post

      Call him out...? Seems like a simple way to solve the problem. Knock on his door, say, we are the only two who live here, why are you taking my mail? I left mail there on purpose and now its gone, it isn't like a cat comes in and eats it... If that don't work, start putting down thousands of envelopes, go to the next level, go to the extreme!!
      Thanks, I wish I could. But he's twice my size and a very violent drug addict and dealer. I'm a 5ft 1" female and he has attacked me once already. I called the police and he was arrested, but they let him go as no evidence.

      Also we have been told not to talk to each other, since I reported him to the Antisocial department.

      I didn't want to mention all this. I just want to know how to do the phone lines. Wish I'd just asked "How do you set up phone lines to do competitions?"

      Thanks anyway. Kind of you all to reply.
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      • Profile picture of the author David Beroff
        Originally Posted by bionictortoise View Post

        But he's twice my size and a very violent drug addict and dealer. I'm a 5ft 1" female and he has attacked me once already.
        Urm... if you can't rely on the authorities for help, I'd strongly advise moving. It may not be "right" that you have to do this, but it sounds like you've got bigger concerns than mail theft.
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        • Profile picture of the author bionictortoise
          Originally Posted by David Beroff View Post

          Urm... if you can't rely on the authorities for help, I'd strongly advise moving. It may not be "right" that you have to do this, but it sounds like you've got bigger concerns than mail theft.
          Thank you. Yes, I am trying to move, but for me it cannot happen overnight. If I was on my own I could live anywhere, but many landlords don't allow pets. It would be a lot easier if I did not have an elderly dog, but I refuse to give her up.

          Like I said, I should not have mentioned my neighbor. I just wanted technical advice.

          Although now I'm thinking I could set up a camera, and make a very conspicuous looking envelope, and pass it in front of the camera, then show me putting it on the floor. That might work as evidence.
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          • Profile picture of the author AprilCT
            You say you can't move soon because of your elderly dog. I do hope you are using your equivalent of a real estate agency to help you find something faster. This surely sounds like a very dangerous situation.
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          • Profile picture of the author butters
            Originally Posted by bionictortoise View Post

            Thank you. Yes, I am trying to move, but for me it cannot happen overnight. If I was on my own I could live anywhere, but many landlords don't allow pets. It would be a lot easier if I did not have an elderly dog, but I refuse to give her up.

            Like I said, I should not have mentioned my neighbor. I just wanted technical advice.

            Although now I'm thinking I could set up a camera, and make a very conspicuous looking envelope, and pass it in front of the camera, then show me putting it on the floor. That might work as evidence.
            Because I feel bad for you situation I found this...

            https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/co...tampered-with/

            Furthermore... This is simply proven in court... Make a custom envelope, make it something which stands out completely and no other company will ever send. Set up the cameras like everyone said. Make 2 copies of each envelope, one for you, one for him, keep the receipts of you making these envelops, they are cheap now days. Get the videos, of each interception. Once one has been intercepted, take a voice recorder, standard iPhone app etc... then just knock on his door and ask, do you have my mail. If he says no, beautiful, do that 5-10 times, then your have a case.

            Sounds like a dick of a neighbour though and you should move out asap.

            You could even considering harassment to if he threatened you etc...
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            • Profile picture of the author bionictortoise
              Originally Posted by AprilCT View Post

              You say you can't move soon because of your elderly dog. I do hope you are using your equivalent of a real estate agency to help you find something faster. This surely sounds like a very dangerous situation.


              I have not up until now as private accomodation costs more than Council which I am in now. But I might register with some and give them a checklist of what I need in case something comes up. Thanks




              Originally Posted by peterj View Post

              1. As Dan Riffle said investigate the post office option. If you report that your mail isn't reaching you, they will have to investigate. To what extent, I don't know.

              2. Keep going back to the police, become a pain in their necks. From what you have said this guy has convictions and a history behind him. So the police should be giving you the benefit of the doubt, Being a woman who he has already attacked should make them sit up and take notice regardless of proof.

              3. I can't think of the correct title/term, but contact some kind of women's support group for information on how to deal with this sort of thing. I'm sure they would be able to point you in the right direction.

              Your plan/s, although good will be hard to pull off on your own in regards to using the results as proof with any of the authorities. It does sound like something the post office/police might use to prove what is happening to missing mail.

              Failing the above I am assuming that you don't have any hard nut friends or connections that could have a quiet 'word' with this Muppet.

              Thanks a lot.

              I might try the police and Victim Support again.

              Sadly all the hard nuts I know in my town are him and his "associates"! My brothers live 200 miles away.





              Originally Posted by butters View Post

              Because I feel bad for you situation I found this...

              https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/co...tampered-with/

              Furthermore... This is simply proven in court... Make a custom envelope, make it something which stands out completely and no other company will ever send. Set up the cameras like everyone said. Make 2 copies of each envelope, one for you, one for him, keep the receipts of you making these envelops, they are cheap now days. Get the videos, of each interception. Once one has been intercepted, take a voice recorder, standard iPhone app etc... then just knock on his door and ask, do you have my mail. If he says no, beautiful, do that 5-10 times, then your have a case.

              Sounds like a dick of a neighbour though and you should move out asap.

              Thanks, I can't knock on his door because of what I said earlier, but thanks for the Citizens Advice stuff.

              I should go back to Royal Mail too though, as they should not have delivered my mail. They all know me as I pick my mail up every week, but the times it has happened, it has been a temporary postman on my route.

              Thanks a lot everyone for your kind replies.
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              • Profile picture of the author peterj
                Originally Posted by bionictortoise View Post

                I have not up until now as private accomodation costs more than Council which I am in now. But I might register with some and give them a checklist of what I need in case something comes up. Thanks

                ..
                .
                If you are in council housing, you should start working that angle.

                If you tell them (council housing) the situation and the that you are frightened and feeling vulnerable etc... they will probably try and get you moved pretty quick.

                Especially if you have the Victims Support behind you. You need to emphasise the feeling frightened and vulnerable side,
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          • Profile picture of the author Dan Riffle
            Originally Posted by bionictortoise View Post

            I just wanted technical advice.
            If you want to set up a phone line - although I don't recommend this avenue - just google "voice mail box" and find a service available in the UK. They'll provide the # and you set up the mail box. Done.

            Getting your neighbor to bite is the real issue. Further, he could always say he isn't the person in the recording. I doubt the authorities are going to run vocal analysis for mail theft. A number trace will be pointless. If he's a drug dealer, I would assume the number wouldn't come back to him.

            Video would probably be better. BUT, if he sees the camera, he's likely to throttle you.
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            • Profile picture of the author bionictortoise
              Originally Posted by bizgrower View Post

              Either move asap, or get your landlord to move him quickly. I think it's safe to assume he's behind on rent or does something else the landlord can put him out for. Especially if you explain the mail, the poisoning the dog, and assaulting you.
              All of those avenues have already failed, due to no proof. The attack was dropped by police even with an audio of me screaming. They said they needed video.

              Originally Posted by bizgrower View Post

              I think it's safe to assume he's behind on rent or does something else the landlord can put him out for.
              He won't be behind on his rent. He does not work, so he'll get his rent paid by the government.


              Originally Posted by Dan Riffle View Post

              If you want to set up a phone line - although I don't recommend this avenue - just google "voice mail box" and find a service available in the UK. They'll provide the # and you set up the mail box. Done.

              Getting your neighbor to bite is the real issue. Further, he could always say he isn't the person in the recording. I doubt the authorities are going to run vocal analysis for mail theft. A number trace will be pointless. If he's a drug dealer, I would assume the number wouldn't come back to him.

              Video would probably be better. BUT, if he sees the camera, he's likely to throttle you.
              Thanks a lot. He already knows about my other cameras. If I use a camera on the front door it will definitely not be seen.
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  • Profile picture of the author peterj
    1. As Dan Riffle said investigate the post office option. If you report that your mail isn't reaching you, they will have to investigate. To what extent, I don't know.

    2. Keep going back to the police, become a pain in their necks. From what you have said this guy has convictions and a history behind him. So the police should be giving you the benefit of the doubt, Being a woman who he has already attacked should make them sit up and take notice regardless of proof.

    3. I can't think of the correct title/term, but contact some kind of women's support group for information on how to deal with this sort of thing. I'm sure they would be able to point you in the right direction.

    Your plan/s, although good will be hard to pull off on your own in regards to using the results as proof with any of the authorities. It does sound like something the post office/police might use to prove what is happening to missing mail.

    Failing the above I am assuming that you don't have any hard nut friends or connections that could have a quiet 'word' with this Muppet.
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  • Profile picture of the author bizgrower
    Either move asap, or get your landlord to move him quickly. I think it's safe to assume he's behind on rent or does something else the landlord can put him out for. Especially if you explain the mail, the poisoning the dog, and assaulting you.
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  • Profile picture of the author bizgrower
    If they do pop him for mail fraud and that does not put him in prison, then you have a worse problem.
    Guys like him don't play by the civilized rules the rest of us do.

    Just move.
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    • Profile picture of the author Kay King
      All of those avenues have already failed, due to no proof. The attack was dropped by police even with an audio of me screaming. They said they needed video.
      It sounds as if you have been trying one thing after another to either get rid of this neighbor or cause him problems. That's not smart.

      How would you have an "audio" of you screaming because he "attacked' you - but no bruises or proof of the 'attack'.

      You are focused on trying to trap or bait this man so you can cause him problems and I don't think a few pieces of missing mail is the problem.

      Move. If you can't or won't move - start ignoring the neighbor. Stop taking him on - stop trying to get him in trouble - stop dirty looks and smart remarks if that is happening. Have you ever thought perhaps this man is telling people he knows about his "crazy neighbor" who keeps making accusations against him?

      If you stay - why not suggest you both declare a truce and mutually ignore each other while respecting each other's space?

      Whether your neighbor works or not - who pays his rent, etc - is none of your business. I think you've turned a fuss into a vendetta and he may not play by your rules.
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  • Profile picture of the author laurencewins
    I think the phone angle could be done easily with a "burner" phone, a cheap cell phone with a separate number that you'll know if it rings, it is definitely him. Use that if you set up competitions.

    Other than that, I agree with the others about getting the hell out of there. As you say, you're short, mild mannered and female and he's a big rough thug...all it takes is the wrong word and he could knock you flying.

    Good luck but get out of there if you possibly can. Do you have a friend who could look after your dog temporarily? or even somebody you can stay with while you find somewhere else to live?
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