Ever Spent Time In The Slammer????

19 replies
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I did.

Don't do the crime if you can't do the time.

I bravely did my 60.

Minutes that is.

The story...

I was just learning to drive and decided to take my new - used car out for a spin without a licensed driver in the car with me.

After a couple of minutes...

I made a extremely wild right turn and what do you know???

Here comes a officer of the law on a motorcycle directly towards me.

My first car was a real piece of s***, my right turn was wild indeed so of course...

...Motorcycle cop makes a u-tun and decides to follow me.

He does this for about 2 blocks and then signals for me to pull over as I happen to be approaching my granny's house.

My little cousins are outside playing and I instruct them to hurry and get grandma!!!

The officer requests my license and registration and I hand him my learners permit and my registration.

I try to pretend that I didn't know it was not a license etc. and the officer laughs and tells me that he going to have to arrest me.

My grandmother calls my parents with the news.

The officer calls a squad car to escort me downtown for processing.

within 15 minutes...

I'm put in the back of the squad car and I proceed to lay down in the car taking a peak every now and then to see where we are in the journey.

Of course the officer asks why I'm laying down and I reply...

"I don't want anyone to see me in here" and he let's out a good hearty laugh.

Now I'm in the police station...

The Sargent in charge says...

How much bail can you come up with???

I reply in my most pitiful voice...

Only about $50 dollars.

He replies....

$50 it is.

Now it's time to take me to a cell...

Dude opens the cell, I walk in and as I ask about my one phone call, he slams the cell door on me and gives me a evil look - as he locks the cell.

10 minutes later they allow me to make a call and I'm informed that my sister is on the way to bail me out.

About an hour later my sis bails me out.

2-3 weeks later I go to court.

The guy before me gives the judge a very hard time just for a plea of guilty or not guilty.

For some crazy reason....

I decide to do the same.

When the judge asks me how do I plead...

I start my song and dance and he repeats the question.

I proceed to stretch him to the extreme outer limits of his patience before I finally plead guilty and he hits me with $50 fine.

We pay the fine and I'm a free man!!

  • Profile picture of the author ThomM
    No details, but yes a few times.

    Life: Nature's way of keeping meat fresh
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    As you are I was, as I am you will be
    You can't fix stupid, but you can always out smart it.

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    • Profile picture of the author Jagged
      In what country?

      They say..."you haven't lived life to the fullest unless you spent at least one night in jail"....well, lets just say I've lead a pretty full life so far...
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  • Profile picture of the author bugbuguk
    Yeah, can beat a night in the slammer! It does however get tedious after some time.

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  • Profile picture of the author Lawrh
    Not yet...

    “Strategy without action is a day-dream; action without strategy is a nightmare.” – Old Japanese proverb -

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  • Profile picture of the author Aussie_Al
    Originally Posted by sgtwhite View Post

    Yep. Got into a fist fight with a merchant sailer in Hong Kong. We both got put into the
    brig. He punched my first, so they let me go in four hours. Went back to the same bar,
    and finished my shore leave pass.
    lol sounds like a good night out
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  • Profile picture of the author MikeAmbrosio
    TL - I have a similar story to yours...

    Only I was 17 and it was a moped.

    This was 1981 so there was no permits required for mopeds yet - in fact, helmets were not even required for these.

    But I wasn't hauled in for riding the moped. It was because I ran a red light and it was past 10 PM (the technical curfew back then).

    They impounded the moped (which, incidentally, was NOT mine but a friends) and took me to the station. Since I was 17, I needed a parent or guardian to get me. My mother worked nights as a waitress in a diner and if I called her and she missed her hours, she would KILL me.

    Luckily, my sister was 18. She was allowed to come get me. And believe me - she held it over my head

    Total time in the "klink" - about 90 minutes.

    I was not put into handcuffs, and the cop let me ride in the front seat.

    There were a few incidents where I COULD have gone to jail... but I was one lucky kid

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    • Profile picture of the author Kay King
      I was arrested - and I think I was their worst nightmare by the time it was done.

      I was 40 - and had borrowed a friend's car while mine was in the shop. Didn't know he forgot to put his new stickers on the license plate! I drove his car ONE time and got two tickets for the outdated license plate.

      I went to the county office and told them I wanted to pay the tickets - I paid and they said "all clear". About four months later 2 plains clothes cops showed up at my house and arrested me for "outstanding ticket".

      Turns out one ticket was county - the other city - but the person where I paid didn't mention that I wasn't paying both and the "all clear" really wasn't.

      They took me to the slammer (city jail) and expected me to just write a check - and I wouldn't. It would have cut me a bit short on bills had I paid the $120 (plus court costs) that day and though I could do it, it wasn't convenient.

      So then they wanted me to "call someone" - and I wouldn't. So they said they'd have to put me in a cell - so I said "OK". They brought me some magazines and kept coming back every few minutes to see if I was ready to call someone to come and pay and get me out - and I said "no, thank you."

      They got sort of frustrated with me. The chief of police came in to talk to me and said "ma'am, we don't want to keep you here". And I said "well, you came and got me...".

      Finally, they sent a guy over from the courthouse to ask me if I would be willing to pay the fine (without extra costs) within 30 days - and I said "Sure, I'll be happy to do that".

      So they let me out (and gave me back the shoestrings to my Reeboks - now THAT was funny) - and I walked out. I was about a mile from home and it was a nice day.

      A few minutes later the same cops pulled up and told me to get in the car. They took me home because one guy said "with our luck you'll get mugged on the way".

      It was interesting - another experience I hadn't had.


      Saving one dog will not change the world - but the world will change forever for that one dog.
      It takes nothing away from a human to be kind to an animal.
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      • Profile picture of the author Steven Wagenheim
        Because of a computer error in Trenton, I was arrested for driving on the
        revoked list.

        I was handcuffed and locked up for about an hour I think. I then went to
        court and the judge said I had to bring a document from Trenton Motor
        Vehicle proving it was their error.

        But because I couldn't drive (they impounded my car) I had to get my
        mother to drive me to Trenton. Oh, it was my mom who bailed me out.

        We went to Trenton, got the paperwork, and returned it to the judge.

        If I live to be a hundred, I'll never forget this.

        But I try...Oh do I try.
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  • Profile picture of the author TLTheLiberator

    you're not the only lucky kid as there were numerous occasions where I could have landed in the criminal justice system.

    But there was something about jail that turned me off.

    Plenty of guys I grew up with landed in the slammer - some for long stays but when I smelled real trouble - I was nowhere to be found.


    "It's easier to fool people than to convince them that they have been fooled. -- Mark Twain

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  • Profile picture of the author Jagged
    I even went as far as refusing to get a tattoo...tough to do when your running with bikers.........sole reason was....it was easy identification for the police.
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  • Profile picture of the author KimW
    I was held in a cell for about 4-5 hours after I told a judge he had done something unfair. He jailed me for contempt of court.
    After I was released I appealed the sentence and the Judge was overturned,but it didn't get me those 4-5 hours back.

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    • Profile picture of the author SonnyKing
      Yup a couple times...in a couple states

      I was bad when I was younger...
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    • Profile picture of the author TimPhelan
      I was in jail over night once. I won't go into details as to why because it wasn't quite as innocent as some other stories here. ( Very good stories by the way! )

      I was put into a big city jail cell with about 10 or 15 other offenders. The cell was sort of a detox area for suspects and I was lucky enough to be in the company of a couple guys who got busted for being under the influence of PCP, also known as angel dust. Others were either drunk, stoned, wired or a combination. One guy was a thin red haired dude who kept talking sh$t to the cops and anyone else who within hearing distance. He was annoying the hell out of all of the other guys and the cops. He kept saying his lawyers were going to destroy the a-holes who were responsible for his being in jail and demanded to be released.

      After a couple hours, the red haired guy was taken away, but I had a strong feeling it wasn't because his lawyers came. I had the impression the cops were pissed and he was going to be taken somewhere where "good cop - bad cop" would be practiced, only without the good cop part. Then again, he may have been taken out of the cell for his own protection.
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  • Profile picture of the author garyv
    Does on the slammer count?

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  • Profile picture of the author Kenster
    Nope, not yet....its actually one of my biggest fears though, not that I do anything that would get me there
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  • Profile picture of the author MikeAmbrosio
    Kay reminded me of another incident...

    After I got out of the Navy, I got a letter in the mail about a failure to appear in traffic court. That was perplexing since I had not gotten any tickets.

    Well, it turns out that my brother - while I was in the Navy - lost his license. So he applied for a replacement license under my name (saying it was lost). Back then, in Jersey, they still had paper licenses with no photos. We look similar, so they gave him one.

    He got a couple of tickets one night (running a stop sign, speeding, reckless driving). He never paid the tickets, ignored the warnings and moved to Florida.

    I went down to the police station to let them know they had the wrong guy - but of course, it's not for them to decide. I had to post a $250 bail right then and there or go sit in the can.

    Luckily they were nice. They let me walk across the street to an ATM to get money.

    Ultimately, I went to court, proved it wasn't me, had it thrown out and got my bail back, but I kicked the sh1t out of my brother when he came back to Jersey...

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  • Yes, I've been to several different jails many times.

    Mind you, it was only because I used to be on the staff teaching computer courses to the inmates!

    Andrea, The English Webmistress
    The-English-Webmistress is really Andrea, who went backpacking the world, accidentally landed in Panama, Central America, and never left. (Beaches! Mountains! Hot latin music! Piña Coladas!) She doesn't miss the London commute AT ALL...
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  • Profile picture of the author Glenn Leader
    I made a very serious mistake when I was a teenager, and ended up serving over 24 years, much of it very hard, and no time off for good behavior...

    Never getting married again!
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